Category Archives: Vampire Nap

THE REINCARNATED VAMPIRE WANTS AN AFTERNOON NAP – 06

 

Port Town Alrescha

“So this is Hanapecha.”

“It’s Alrescha. Do you like the town?”

“It’s quite nice. The wind is a bit salty, but it feels good.”

The salty breeze was strong enough to be smelt from the bed of the carriage. It was the characteristic smell of a coastal region.

The view of the townscape from the carriage gave off the feel of a foreign port town. The slightly old-fashioned look of the buildings also let off a pleasant atmosphere. There’s nothing to criticize about it as a tourist spot.

… It would have been a good idea to have mentioned something about the food situation to loligramps.

While it was charming to have a quiet place where I could sleep for as long as I wanted, if I had stayed there, I would have starved.

Because a person happened to be passing by, I ended up leaving my birthplace… but this new area looked pretty nice. I wanted to quickly have a nap.

“Well then, I’m fine here.”

“Ah… W-Wait a second Arge-san.”

As I started to step off of the carriage, Zeno calls out to me.

To be blunt, the name Arge that I have gotten used to being called over the past few days was really half-assedly picked.

My full name is Argento Vampear. Argento is the Italian word for silver and Vampear is the French word for vampire.

(TL: I chose to write ‘vampire’ as ‘vampear’ to distinguish it from the english word. It’s the usual trouble with Japanese being able to use foreign words for everything. Take 吸血鬼 and ヴァンパイア as an example, although it’s written ヴァンピール in this novel.  Seriously, I’m going to shoot someone one of these days over katakana…)

I could have used the name from my past life, but Kuon Ginji is definitely a guy’s name. I may have felt like a guy inside, but I was physically a girl, so I ended up picking a name that sounded feminine.

“What?”

“Please take this and this.”

Zeno-kun searched the inside of carriage and handed me a black hooded cape and leather bag. When I took the bag, it made a jingling sound. It’s pretty heavy, is there gold inside?

“There might only be a little, but please use it as funds for your travels.”

“Ah, so this is money… Is this ok, even though you’re a merchant?”

I wasn’t thinking about that problem at all, so the truth is, I was super thankful for the cash… however, for a merchant, money is supposed to be more important than anything else. Was it really okay for him to so readily give this to someone with such a suspicious background?

“It’s because you saved my life. Also, while you’re in town, please try to keep the hood on. Arge-san stands out a lot, so this way it should stop… you know, stop you from being hit on.”

Ah, that does sound like a pain.

From what I can tell, it isn’t an exaggeration to call the current me’s appearance an unrivaled beautiful girl.

Judging from the Terrier Bandits’ and Zeno-kun’s reactions, my evaluation didn’t seem to be wrong. For this reason, it might end up being important to cover my face. I have no interest in men. If they were to feed and care for me, it’s a different story though.

… Zeno-kun seemed like the diligent type.

If I were to marry a person like this, helping out with his business seems tiresome.

To make matters worse, he’s a peddler, Meaning, unless he retires, there will never be a chance to settle down. As a target to leech off of, he’s not perfect. This sucks.

Also, the uncomfortableness of the carriage’s luggage area lost him some points as well.

Even if you docked these points, there’s no mistaking Zeno-kun is a good person. He had even done all of this for me.

“Uun… I feel kinda bad after all this.”

“It’s fine. Even for me, I feel kinda bad after receiving a horse.”

No, that’s just something you picked up from the Terrier Bandits.

“I still can’t casually accept this. I can’t repay you with anything right now though… how about next time we meet?”

“Next time?”

“Yes. If we meet again and Zeno-kun is in trouble, please let me save you.”

In exchange for saving his life, the thing I requested of him was to feed me.

I had already received my reward. That’s why I considered him taking me this far, clothing me, and giving me money a separate case from that deal.

It might have felt natural to Zeno-kun, but me being unable to pay back his goodwill makes me feel sick.

I might be extremely lazy, but I’m the type to properly settle my debts.

Even if I thought that, all I have is my body. Even the clothes I am wearing don’t belong to me.

The only thing I can pay with right now is a verbal promise.

Of course, a verbal promise is still a promise. If we were to ever meet again, if I had something to pay him with, I would gladly pay the price. It’s this type of feeling behind this promise.

After making this promise, it’s probably best to go our separate ways for now.

“… If you put it that way, I understand.”

“Well then, I’ll be off. Thank you so much. Please hire proper bodyguards from now on.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Stay healthy, Arge-san!”

I properly pulled down the hood and jumped off the carriage.

With some reluctance, I walked quickly and disappeared into the crowd without looking back.

Well then, first things first…

“… Let’s get some lunch.”

Naps are nice and all, but I just received money, so let’s gratefully use it. Money is only valuable when used after all.

THE REINCARNATED VAMPIRE WANTS AN AFTERNOON NAP – 05

 

Silver Discovery

“Hey, this is pretty good.”

Said the unrivaled beauty as she stuffed her cheeks full of jerky.

For whatever reason, I was saved by this girl and now the two of us are eating lunch together.

… I wonder, what exactly is this child.

The route I was assaulted on is a shortcut well known amongst peddlers. The route is an ancient and unused highway. All that’s nearby is a collapsed country.

The merchant’s guild would like to restore it; however, between the bandits and monsters, repairs aren’t proceeding as planned. Because of this, the path is rugged and casualties from attacks are high.

I was in a rush so I had no choice but to take this path… And just as I thought, I was attacked. If this girl hadn’t been passing through, I would surely be dead.

I knew a little magic and believed it to be enough, but those three were skilled to the point that my only option was to flee. Even so, those three were sent flying with a kick as if they were children. This girl… Exactly what is she? Her age seems to be around 13-14…

“Thank you, to even go so far as to lend me your clothes.”

“I-It’s fine. It’s good that the size fits you well.”

The clothes are one of my products, a set of mage clothing. The girl said she had no clothes, so I had given her a set.

It’s true that she’s my savior, but without them, I’m troubled about where to look.

… It was quite the nice physique.

Due to my nature as a merchant, I’ve travelled across many countries and I had met many beauties. Occasionally, I had even “bought” some of them.

I believed that I had met many beautiful women; however, this girl in front of my very eyes… To give my honest impression, there was nothing that could be compared.

Out of all the women I had seen, she possessed the most exquisite face of them all. I had never considered myself a lolicon, but it may be time for me to reevaluate that belief.

And so, as we ate our meal, I came to find her act of licking the salt and oil off of her hands as attractive. Despite that, I found her to be quite androgynous, or maybe it would be better to put it as unladylike or open… That is also…

“…? Is there something wrong?”

“No, nothing of concern.”

If I stare too long,I feel I’ll drown in those scarlet eyes. I forced my gaze away; however, it felt rude, so I shifted my gaze to her forehead.

Even though our eyes don’t meet, it is a line of sight that gives the impression of “He is looking at my face.”

“By the way, where is this carriage headed?”

“It is headed for a town called Alrescha”

“Shiwakucha?” (Crumpled)

“It’s Alrescha”

“… Does that place have a stable climate, delicious food, and good public order?”

“If you’re just talking about this country, it’s on the better side in my opinion.”

It is a town on the coast, so while the breeze is salty, it is pleasant all year round.

Being on the coast has caused trade to prosper and the seafood is always fresh. The town is also an important region to the country, so public order is well-maintained. If I had to fault something, it would be that the lord of the region is a womanizer.

When I explained all this to her, the silver-haired girl thought for a little before she replied and said, “…Sashimi sounds good. If it is fine with you, could you give me a lift there.”

“Sure, with pleasure.”

I couldn’t turn down my savior, even if I wanted to.

On top that, to be able to travel with such a beautiful girl, it would make more sense for me to ask her to accompany me.

“By the way, I didn’t quite catch your name. My name is Zeno, Zeno Kotobuki.”

“Ah… Oh yeah, a name…”

“…? Is something wrong?”

Did I ask a strange question?

The girl ruffled her beautiful silver hair while making a troubled face.

… Is there some reason why she can’t reveal her name to me?

Being in this place without any clothing, it’s hard to call that natural.

I won’t pretend to know what’s going on, but I’m sure there must be a good reason for all this.

To not be able to immediately state her name, there must be a troubling reason behind it.

I don’t know anything about the other party’s background. This means there’s a large amount of uncertainty, a major burden for any merchant. Disregarding the looks, I can’t get a read on what’s inside.

… But she’s my savior.

A merchant is someone who always remains cool, yet never forgets courtesy.

The other party protected my most valuable asset, my life. She even saved my cargo.

Before even going into profit, she’s my greatest benefactor. If she doesn’t want to talk about it, it’s fine not to ask. Let’s end the discussion here.

“Um…”

“Argento Vampear.”

“Ha?”

“It’s long, so just call me Arge.”

“… I understand.”

Judging from the flow of the conversation, it’s easy to imagine the name she just told me is false.

Even so, I silently accepted it.

What’s important is that the girl in front of me, my savior, struggled to answer my question, even though it must have been difficult for her. Even if it is not the truth, I only have the right to accept it.

In this way, my mysterious savior and I spent several days together until we arrived at the town of Alrescha.

After this, my path and hers would cross multiple times. For our fates to be drawn together in this way, I had no way of knowing it at the time.

THE REINCARNATED VAMPIRE WANTS AN AFTERNOON NAP – 04

Tl’d by Himmel (Hime)

Edited by Hitler and Doom-kun

Tlc’d by Kou-san (I have no idea what’s going on; Nazis invaded)

The Adorable Bandit-san

 

“HYAAAHAAAA! HAND OVER EVERYTHING YOU HAAAVE!!”

 

The reason I can understand this world’s language is thanks to the Language Translation skill. It’s a really convenient ability since my words are also translated and delivered to the other party, so I don’t have to worry about having any issues while conversing. As expected of the daily special.

 

If I focus with this ability, I can even communicate with animals, but as expected, there is really no need to go that far. Let’s just limit the effectiveness to humans as it had been up till now. It’s an ability that can be configured like that too.

 

…Be that as it may, what’s with this cliche?

 

The bandit’s lines seemed like they had already been heard by half of humanity.

 

Despite thinking that, for the time being, I decided to stage a showy entrance in order to make my existence known.

 

I rushed to the location between the horse drawn cart and the three bandits before abruptly stopping with all my strength. The sudden deceleration whips up a flashy dust cloud.

 

I sprinted here barefoot and even though my feet have gouged a hole in the ground, it doesn’t hurt at all. Vampires sure are sturdy.

If I were still human, it would have been impossible to create this meteorite-like impact like circumstance with a regular human body. Vampires sure are amazing.

 

“W-What the-!?”

 

Even in the cloud of dust, I could comprehend that the three bandits and the horse drawn carriage have stopped. Thanks to my enhanced sense of smell I can understand what’s around me.

 

…Ah, there’s an amazing smell coming from the carriage.

 

Some kind of sausage or preserved meat…also the sweet smell of bread and vegetables. The more I focus on it the hungrier I become. Having a strong sense of smell can also be a problem.

… Let’s finish this quickly and claim a reward.

While I was thinking about such things, the cloud of dust dispersed and I confronted the three bandits.

The bandit facing me on my right pointed at me with a trembling finger,

 

“B-Boss! A pervert came out of the dust cloud!”

 

Oh, that kind of reaction huh.

 

Certainly, I’m not wearing any clothes right now. Looking at my body once again, I have long silver hair that seemed to wrap around my body mostly covering the important parts, but no matter how you look at it  I’m naked. It probably can’t be helped that I’m treated as a female pervert.

 

Well, that doesn’t matter right now anyway. What’s really important now is that I satisfy my hunger.

 

“Umm, excuse me bleeding forehead merchant-san”

 

“Y-Yes!?”

 

I turned around and the merchant bleeding from his forehead replied while covering his face with his hands.

 

To not look at a naked woman’s body, how very gentlemanly…or so I thought, until I saw him staring at my butt through the gaps between his fingers. Huh, he was just your typical closet pervert.

 

“If you give me food I’ll help you out, so what will it be?”

“Huh…what?”

“ No, I’m saying if you give me food I’ll save you. If you don’t want that I’ll immediately go somewhere else, so what will it be?”

“Err, then, please…”

“Okay, your request has been accepted.”

 

Obviously the other party was confused, but he agreed to my offer. I got him to agree, so it’s my win in this situation. *Grin*

 

Well then, let’s help him as promised.

I’m passionless but I don’t like to break promises. Promises are something meant to be kept. Because I’ve made one, I’ll properly keep it. Swallowing a thousand needles is scary anyway.

 

“Well then…From the right, you’re Overgrown Leghair-san, Caped Baldy-san, and Semi-visible Nosehair-san.“

 

“““WHAT’S WITH THOSE NAMES!?”””

They splendidly harmonized. The three of them actually harmonized their dissatisfaction. I thought the nicknames captured their unique features, but it looks like they don’t like them.

 

Good grief, whether it’s these guys or Loligramps-san, they’re such selfish people. Be like bleeding from his forehead merchant-san and show me you can obediently accept the name.

 

“Overgrown Leghair-san, Caped Baldy-san, did you want Semi-visible Nosehair-san’s name?”

“““THAT WASN’T THE PROBLEM!!!”””

 

Again they harmonized. They sure do get along~.

 

While I was thinking about what to call them, the three bandits simultaneously jumped off their horses. As they did so, they somersaulted in midair and landed on the ground elegantly. Each of them took a strange pose and started to give a speech.

 

“I am the chain and sickle, Chihuahua!”

“I am the explosive, Dachs!”

“And finally there’s the amazing me, the knife thrower, Terrier!! All together we three are the Terrier Bandit Troupe! “

 

“…Pff-“

 

“““IS THERE SOMETHING FUNNY!?”””

 

“S-Sorry, just give me a minute…Pffhaha”

 

…Don’t you all have names of small dogs?

Since it’s another world, the meaning might be different. From my perspective though, all three of them are dogs! And small dog breeds at that!

 

The three all look tough, but their names…Ah, this is bad. I’m completely stuck on the dog thing.. To make matters worse, the three of them seem to be pretty honorable; they’re just watching me laugh at them while their shoulders shake in anger. That barely contained trembling looks just like a puppy’s…

 

“Aha, ahahahaha! I can’t take it anymore, what’s with that? It’s so cute…Ahahahahahha!”

 

“You bastard…Don’t get so cocky!”

 

“Kyaan!?”

 

Chain and sickle Chihuahua-chan, in accordance to his name, used a chain and sickle to attack me.

The sickle that Chihuahua-chan was holding has a chain attached to its body and a counterweight on the other end. A pretty typical chain and sickle appearance.

 

The horizontally swung chain wrapped around my body. As Chihuahua-chan pulled the chain, it constricted and the counterweight got caught in the chain, completing a lock.

 

… Ahh, so this is how the chain and sickle catches its opponents.

I’m surprised. And then since my surprised voiced sounded unexpectedly feminine, I became even more surprised.

 

As expected, even though I have the consciousness of a male, my body is that of a female. No way, I’m being forcefully turned into a girl…!

 

“Guhehe…I don’t know why there’s a pervert in this place but what a fine jewel this is. Acting all carefree…After we thoroughly enjoy ourselves, we’ll sell you off to the slave dealer!”

 

I’m sorry, but losing my virginity only three days after being born is a little bit too much for me.

 

There was a part of me that was still going with the flow, but if it becomes like that, then at least be a bit cooler, have stable income, let me roll around without having to do anything, and smile with a friendly grin while accepting anything I ask, that kind of person is good! As a parasitic target, I mean, lover!

 

“Oi oi, haven’t you become rather calm? Ahh!? Do you understand the situation you’re in?”

 

“Ah, Yes yes, I understand perfectly, Chihuahua-chan”

 

“Calling me with –chan…You bastard, it looks like you won’t understand till I seriously violate you at least once! “

 

Chihuahua-chan’s veins stood out as he pulled tightly on the chain. He started to draw me in, or so he had planned.

 

“Hng-!?”

 

… It’s not good to think that I’m that powerless okay?

 

I only lightly put some power into my legs, but with Chihuahua-chan’s degree of strength, I didn’t budge. A look as if something unbelievable just happened settled onto Chihuahua’s face.

 

“W-Why…!?”

 

“You also, can you see the situation you are in?”

 

In the first place, three mob characters challenging an opponent without thinking is quite a stupid thing to do.

 

The reason why I decided to appear in front of them is quite simple. It’s because from the people standing in front of me, I don’t feel any wonder or amazement.

 

For example, it feels like I’m looking at hamsters in a cage. See, there’s no sense of danger to be felt right? Rather, you’d think it’s an adorable thing to look at.

 

Somehow, it seems I can currently grasp the strength of my opponents just by looking at them. Specifically, by smelling them.

 

This is the “Blood Reading” skill. With this skill, I can grasp information on my opponent’s ability through their blood, but somehow, from the smell of their blood I can also get a general understanding of how strong they are as well.

 

My opponents haven’t spilt any blood yet. But even still, at this distance, my nose can tell approximately what kind of blood they have every time. This is thanks to the Enhanced Olfaction skill.

Meaning, this information was obtained by using Blood Reading and Enhanced Olfaction together.

 

… Well, I already maxed out Blood Reading anyway.

 

It was a little unreasonable, but the fact that it became unusually convenient is not a laughing matter. Reaching this effect with just smell every time that is.

 

For example, even if they all teamed up against me, I wouldn’t receive even a scratch. Because I have such confidence, that’s why I have been so carefree.

 

“Heave-ho.”

 

Since the chains felt annoying, I turned the upper half of my body into fog and slipped out. This is the “Fog-Form” ability. I can even turn each of my body parts into fog individually. Very convenient.

 

“W-Wha…!?”

 

“Tch…Dachs!”

 

“Got it, boss.”

 

Unlike the dumbfounded Chihuahua-chan, Terrier-chan calmly gave Dachs-chan instructions.

Dachs-chan took out a round object from his breast pocket. The round object had a cord-like substance connected to it, and Dachs-chan lit it on fire with a match.

 

Since it seems your name is “Explosive Dachs,” that is without a doubt a bomb right?

“How about this!!”

 

Dachs-chan took up a clean pitching position, and with an overhand throw, he tossed the bomb.

Isn’t this, a pretty tight situation I’m in?

 

“What will you do if you damage the goods…Wind-san, I’ll leave it to you”

 

Wind Magic.

 

I only have one point allocated in it so I can’t do anything amazing but, summoning some wind is no problem.

 

As I wanted, a sudden gust appeared and blew the bomb back to the source, the perpetrators; goodbye… Ah. The fire didn’t go out.

 

““Uheeeee!?””

 

“Get down, men!”

 

Thanks to Terrier-chan promptly pushing the two down, it seems that the three of them didn’t take any damage.

 

The sound of the explosion resounded fairly impressively, but looking at it, the power wasn’t that much. Since I decided to take them alive, I should use something with less gunpowder huh.

 

“Ku…You bastard, you aren’t an ordinary pervert are you!”

 

“Ehh, well…I’m not a pervert though”

 

Since my feelings are that of a male’s, molester…No, that also has a bad implication to it.

 

Anyway, it’s not like I’m not wearing clothes because I like it or anything. Being called a pervert is upsetting, okay?

 

“If it’s become like this, then I don’t care if there’s some injuries. With my knife throwing-”

 

“Wind-san, please”

 

“““UWAAAAAAAAA!?”””

 

Since I’m going to get really hungry soon, it’s time to end this.

 

I abundantly gathered my magic power, and with it, I summoned a sudden gust of wind.

 

Even though what I did was simple, if I increase the input, the scale of the spell becomes bigger; it seems like this is one of the rules of magic in this world. The manual in my head doesn’t seem to be false so with peace of mind, I confidently made use of my power to fully charge the magic.

 

Once I gathered up a vast amount of magic power to create a gust, it became a giant vortex, swallowing up the small breed dog-guys and blowing them away.

 

Splendidly harmonized screams were heard as they left their horses behind and the figures of the Terrier Bandit Troupe disappeared from my view.

 

“Haaa, I’m really hungry now”

 

They were pretty interesting so I wanted play with them some more, but right now, getting some food is my top priority.

 

Well I more or less went easy on them, so I don’t think they’ll die.

 

Probably.

 

THE REINCARNATED VAMPIRE WANTS AN AFTERNOON NAP – 03

 

Re・Verse

“… Fumu”

I open my eyes as my consciousness returns and see that I’m standing in the middle of some ruins.

No matter how you look at it, it’s all in ruins. To top it off, it’s on the scale of a village.

There are buildings in decay as far as the eye can see. There isn’t even a single trace of a person.

It seems I reincarnated, however, my height is exactly the same as my previous life, so my viewpoint hasn’t changed. This, it seems more like I just came to another world instead of being reborn into it.

I thought that for a brief moment, but then I saw myself reflected in a piece of broken glass and changed my opinion.

Long silver hair and red eyes. A face that gave off the feeling of an unrivaled beauty reflected from it.

I tried making a peace sign and the girl also made one, so it’s definitely me, but I’m a 100% full-blooded Japanese. Also, while I did have a feminine face, I was definitely a guy.

In other words, I have been reincarnated. It’s just a guess, but vampires might be born as adults. Therefore, even though I have been reincarnated, I don’t feel any sort of discomfort. I open my mouth and see long, sharp canines growing there. Yup, it’s completely vampirish.

“Well, starting off as a baby is tiresome.”

My gender has changed… well, I’m in the wrong for not specifying, so I guess it’s fine. My crotch feels a bit sparse, but if it’s just that much, I can ignore it. Ah, my chest doesn’t feel strange at all. From what I can see, I’m flat. Still, to be born in a ruin…

… Loligramps-san, this is slightly different from what I had thought of.

Sure the weather is calm, the temperature is warm, and there’s a nice breeze. The air also tastes good and it’s the perfect environment for a nap. But seriously, to drop me off in these ruins.

… Well, it might be a little different from what I was expecting, but it’s not actually wrong, so I guess it’s fine.

The location fits my wishes. Let’s just say everything is fine for now.

Next would be that I’m naked. I was able to realise I had become a girl because of this. Since no one can see me, I guess it’s fine if I’m naked.

When I enter one of the nearby ruins, I spot a bed inside. It looks like it hasn’t been used in ages and is slightly falling apart, but it can still be slept on.

Well, the surroundings offset any complaints I have about it. Half the roof has caved in and some light and a breeze leak in; it’s very pleasant. Vampires are usually weak to the sun, so it’s a good thing I grabbed Sunlight-resistance.

“Ah~…

This, this is happiness.

Let’s sleep. Let’s drift off straight away. Right now.

Obeying my desires, I fell asleep. I continued sleeping to my heart’s content.

Ah, shoot, this is the best… Funya~…

A vampire’s need for food and water is weak, so I was able to sleep without a single worry in the world.

Because I haven’t ingested anything, I have no need for the bathroom. What wonderful days of slothfulness. Viva sloth!

I’m a bit upset there isn’t a bath, however, with high level healing magic, it’s possible to remove dirt from the body. I should’ve maxed out that stat.

The reason why I can understand the effects of my skills, is because it sorta just pops up in my head. It’s easiest to explain it as the feeling of an instructions manual in my head. Following the steps, I’m able to exert the skill’s effect.

“Become clean… Guu…” (Said like a maid blessing your omurice)

Normally, to activate magic, you need to concentrate and recite an incantation, but by pouring in more mana, you can omit it. Because I have the Enhanced Magic Power Skill, it’s only natural I can do this.

It’s a pain to concentrate and recite an incantation, so of course I omitted it and instantly activated the magic. You still need a short keyphrase to activate the magic however, so I randomly came up with one.

In that fashion I periodically woke up to clean my body with healing magic. Three days passed uneventfully. As expected, if you slept that long, your stomach would start to feel empty. My throat is also pretty dry. The dryness of my throat is especially bad, it’s at a point where I can’t quietly sleep it off.

“Ah-… it might have been better if I had become a race that didn’t need to eat.”

It’s kinda late to be complaining about it, so for now, let’s head out to find some water. This is my first time exploring another world, but I just can’t get excited for it. I have my mind preoccupied with images of a futon. Ah, I want to return quickly.

While I was thinking about how blindly searching around is suuuper tiresome… a strange aroma assaulted my nose.

“Now that I think about it, my sense of smell was also strengthened.”

I was forced to learn all my skills, so I remember them. I also have the instruction manuals floating around in my head for reference. It was a pain, but Loligramp’s nagging helped me learn. I was asleep half the time though.

Slightly focusing my conscious onto the aroma gave me a rough idea of what the smell was.

“… It’s the scent of blood.”

It’s not stench, it’s scent.

The current me doesn’t find the aroma unpleasant, instead it just sparks my appetite.

Ah, it looks like I’ve really become a vampire. I have a strong desire to drink blood and I can correctly recognize the scent of it. Being tempted by the pleasant smell, I ran after it.

“Woah, fast.”

Soon after I started running, I was surprised at how fast I was going. I wasn’t even at full speed, yet the ruins I slept in are just specks in the distance now. I was so shocked, I stopped and turned around.

I’m probably much faster than a car. Maxing out speed is amazing.

… With this speed, wouldn’t it be possible to do acrobatics?

Thinking this, I ran at a nearby wall… ohh. I’m climbing it, I’m climbing it.

While still being pulled down by gravity, I forcibly run up the wall and soon find myself on the roof.

Crap, this is pretty fun. It’s no match when compared to sleeping, but it sure makes your heart flutter.

“Well then, I think it came from that way.”

I stare hard at the place where the smell came from… like staring through a telescope, my vision zooms in and lets me clearly observe distant objects. This is the effect of the  Enhanced Vision skill.

Far away in the distance, I start to see the source of the smell.

“… It looks to be bandits chasing merchants.”

Three vulgar-looking men on horseback were chasing a large horse drawn cart.

Even while bleeding from their forehead, the one grasping the cart’s reins was desperately forcing their horses forward. It’s obvious that the ones chasing the cart are nimbler though. It doesn’t look like the cart can outrun them.

“… Might as well go.”

To tell the truth, it’s a massive pain, but it can’t be helped if it will quench my thirst.

I want to finish tiresome things quickly, so I sprint in a straight line for the area.

The Reincarnated Vampire Wants an Afternoon Nap – 02

 

Hello again. Here’s the second chapter. I planned to have it done last Monday, but I suddenly found out about a trip into the countryside to visit relatives. Hurray for no wifi! Anyways, I somehow finished it and got a stable connection to upload, so enjoy. Thanks to Karma this time round for giving it a look through.


 

Will Your Order Be The Status Settings?

“Listen up, a passionless soul is basically one that does not fit in with its world. Have you ever felt it? The feeling that your perception of reality and your surroundings were disjointed?”

“I have, but isn’t it normal for everyone to experience that at least once?”

Because everyone is different, I assume it’s normal for everyone to be confused or disappointed by the difference between each other’s thoughts.

“You are just strange. There are not that many who have your level of passionlessness.”

…. You’re not praising me, are you?

“From what I understand, because I was born in the wrong world, you set up a plan to have me be reborn in a more appropriate one, right?”

“Don’t call it a plan. Instead of a plan, it’s more like cleaning up after ourselves… an apology for sending your soul to the wrong world.”

“Haa….”

Basically, if I reincarnate, I might be able to find the motivation to do things or a reason to live.

I don’t know if it’s okay for me to say this, but I really am a human with very little motivation. Is it really that easy for people to change…?

Even if I think about it, the loligramps has already decided I’ll be reincarnated, so nothing I say will change the situation.

It can’t be helped…. Even if I can’t find any reason, I can always just sleep through life again….

“With that said, I’ll be having you pick your race.”

“Is it okay even if I’m not a human?”

“Yes yes, there are many different existences in your new world. Anything is fine, for instance, vampires are very strong….”

“Then I’ll go with that.”

“That was fast!?”

Well, it’s a pain to think about it.

These types of registrations should be finished quickly. I’ll get very tired if I do them seriously.

“O- okay… I guess it’s fine. Next would be abilities… basically your skill set.”

“Haa…. What kinds of skills are available?”

“First off, you’re a vampire so you have bloodsucking, it’s just that this one….”

“Then I’ll put everything into bloodsucking.”

“…. You’re just being lazy aren’t you?”

“You found out, huh.”

“You…. Fine, I’ll write it all down on a piece of paper so put some serious thought into it. Your soul may be passionless, but the quality is good. If you invest too much into bloodsucking the amount of blood you need will be massive and you’ll die almost immediately.”

“Whats with that pain in the…. Tell me beforehand about abilities with demerits, you useless loligramps.”

“Isn’t it because you just didn’t bother listening to me!?”

Even while grumbling, loligramps wrote out usable skills on the piece of paper.

By the way, the paper in question appeared out of nowhere. Similarly, a pen popped into existence and began writing while floating in midair. The loligramps’s figure is nowhere to be seen as usual.

After waiting for a few minutes in that situation, a piece of paper was placed in front of me. There were too many words on the page, so it was troublesome to read, but the loligramps was annoying, so I begrudgingly ended up looking over it.

☆ Skill list acquirable by beginners/Default skill list:

Vampire-type Ver. 1.27

Bloodsucking

Fog-Form

Bat-Form

Shadow-Form

Blood Pact

Blood Reading

Blood Arms

Blood Box

Language Translation

Language Deciphering

Enhanced Olfaction

Enhanced Vision

Enhanced Magic Power

Healing Magic

Wind Magic

Darkness Magic

Fire-Resistance

Water-Resistance

Holy-Resistance

Darkness-Resistance

Sunlight-Resistance

Poison-Resistance

Curse-Resistance

Magic-Resistance

“Too long.”

Just reading the list makes me tired. That’s how much data is on it.

I believe I’ve worked enough today, let’s just take a nap now.

“You….”

“Can you just randomly pick a few for me?”

“Of course I can’t! It’s your life so you pick them!”

“Ehh~…. Then I’ll just take them all.”

“Even if you take them all, you’ll have points left over…. Please decide which abilities you wish to improve.”

…. So this is the point system.

Judging from what he said, I have to use all my points.

Really, to be so precise, what exactly is this loligramps? Is he Japanese?

“Then, after getting all of them, invest the rest in healing magic and the resistances please.”

Dying again would be troublesome; let’s prioritize survival first. There’s no guarantee I won’t die without suffering like last time.

Poisoning and curses sound painful, and vampires are supposedly weak to sunlight, so let’s focus on these. In case I get hurt, I’ll choose healing magic afterwards.

With all these skills, it should be enough for survival.

“…. Even if we max out all of those abilities, there are still plenty of points left over.”

“What’s today’s specials?”

“Are we a bar!? Whatever, we have Blood-type, Transformation-type, Language-type, Blood Pact, and Magic Power Enhancement!”

“I’ll invest in them all.”

“…. You, really, what exactly are you….”

Oh my, your personality has greatly changed. Are you okay loligramps?

In the end, there were a few more points left over, so I had the rest invested in bloodsucking. If it’s at a certain level, the advantages are greater than the disadvantages, so there’s no problem.

“Next are your physical status settings….”

“There’s still more…. Please randomize it.”

“…. You really are very passionless. If it’s to your extent, it’s a first, even for me.”

“Ehehehe~”

“I’m not complimenting you. I’m not. Don’t go saying such embarrassed-sounding lines with such a blank expression, it’s disturbing. What’s with your uselessly talented acting skills?”

“Since it’s a pain, max out agility please.”

“…. Considering your personality, I thought you would max out defence.”

“Isn’t it obvious? If I have something to do, I want to be able to quickly finish it and go back to bed.”

“Uwaa, I can agree with that reasoning….”

Even though I thought long and hard about how to improve my napping, to reply with such utter astonishment, how upsetting.

“The next setting would be your birthplace. What sort of area would be good?”

“A quiet place with a relatively stable climate. Somewhere perfect for napping please.”

“What’s with the sudden increase in demands!?”

No, isn’t that an important point?

Even with a face that screams, “the hell are you saying,” loligramps breathed out a sigh and agreed with me.

Loligramps is probably a good person. At the very least, he’s good at going with the flow. He’s even good at taking care of others.

I don’t know if he’s God or not, but a person with a good head on their shoulders doesn’t sound too bad. I want him to take care of me for life.

Well, a girlfriend-like figure having to deal with someone like me everyday would probably be impossible…. Still….

“W, what? You suddenly got quiet…. Does your stomach hurt?”

“Nothing, it just appears simple.”

“What does!?”

It’s just my own problem, pay it no mind.

“A- ahem…. With this, the preparations for your reincarnation are complete. All that’s left is for you to prepare your heart for the trip.”

“Then please, hurry with the transport.”

“Humph, I thought you would say that…. Have a safe trip.”

“You as well loligramps, stay healthy. Dealing with people like me will be troublesome, but hang in there.”

“If you understand that, then take it more seriously, fool! Good grief…. Well, see you. Try to find something this time ‘round.”

“Even if you say ‘something’…. What exactly?”

“Something is something. Something that will bring you happiness or regret in life.”

It felt like loligramps smiled a bit.

In the next instant, my body was wrapped in light and my mind started to drift away.

Even if you say ‘something,’ I can’t even begin to picture it….

“Loligramps is giving off a satisfied feeling with my response, so if you’re happy with it, I’ll let you keep believing it.”

“I can still hear you.”

With the feeling of my head being lightly hit, my consciousness began to fade even faster.

What’s up with that; although he has such a kind slap, he wasn’t an easy mark at all.

The Reincarnated Vampire Wants an Afternoon Nap – 01

Hello, I’m the new guy. I’m super lazy and was supposed to have this done last week. (๑≧౪≦) I got help with editing from our pet crayfish Kuroe so it should be amazing.

Thanks to Este for enslaving giving a spot to me and I guess all that’s left to say is, enjoy.


I Died In My Sleep

“… It’s a white room.”

When I awoke this morning, I found myself in a stark white room.

Really, it’s so white that it’s impossible to tell where the walls and ceiling are.

Whether it’s a narrow space or a wide space is also vague. Just looking at it is unsettling.

“So you have finally awoken, new reincarnator.”

“Haa… Good morning.”

“… You give a lighthearted response.”

No, I just woke up badly. My head isn’t working just yet.

For now, I’ll just ask this disembodied voice some questions.

“Where am I?”

“This is the reincarnation room. Here you pick where you will be reincarnated and what race you shall be reincarnated as.”

This person’s voice sounds like a little girl, but speaks like an old man.

“… So I died, Loligramps-san.”

“Sadly, yes… wait, Loligramps!?”

“Yes. Loligramps-san.”

“You… how rude.”

“Sorry, is Grandpa Loli better?”

“That is not the problem! The ordering of words and what I want to say are two separate things!”

Really, to yell at someone who just woke up. He’s kinda an annoying person.

While standing up and stretching to shake off drowsiness, I question the loligramps.

“Nh, mm… How did I die?”

“You move quickly huh… no matter. The cause of your death was sleep apnea.”

Sleep apnea syndrome.

It’s that, where you just stop breathing in your sleep… right?

“You usually aren’t supposed to die from sleep apnea though. It just raises your risk of cerebrovascular disorders and heart diseases.”

“Hmm? That’s what I heard though. Still, your death was indirectly caused by sleep apnea. Really, the upper management does sloppy work… Anyways, you died. Got it?”

“Haa, I understand.”

I don’t know anything about the upper management, but if I died, there’s nothing that can done. I didn’t suffer, so I guess that’s good. It’s much better than dying while in pain and suffering. Instead of living a long life and dying while suffering, dying while young and quickly is much more ideal.

“Then… reincarnation? Why reincarnation? Is there a rule where if you die from sleep apnea you get reincarnated?”

“No, it is just that your soul is… how would you say… passionless.”

“Passionless… is it?”

It was as the voice said, normally I am a passionless person, a person without a scrap of motivation.

I am an existence of self-indulgence, a parasite clinging on to and surviving off of parents.

“Without a doubt I am like a speck of dust on earth, or maybe it’s better to say I’m merely extra baggage, an existence that offers no benefits for being around, like the uvula or appendix.”

“Your self-evaluation is harsh!”

“Well it’s all true. And, what is the point in reincarnating such a passionless person? Go force this on to another a person with more drive. Like a person who died screaming, ‘Noooooo, I won’t die yeeeet!’ would be better right? Then, goodnight.”

“Wait, don’t just say such an obvious answer and casually go back to sleep. Also, what is with that strangely dramatic performance!?”

The futon disappeared before my eyes. Without even leaving time to blink, it really gave off a feeling of vanishing into thin air.

… This, doesn’t seem to be a dream.

Haa. What a pain. I miss my futon.