All posts by Estelulu

President of the Shitposting and Sometimes Translation Club, and twice-convicted Suzuhara Lulu shill.

Book of God – 09

Chapter 9 – They Came Back

『Is this really… the dungeon from that time?』

『There shouldn’t be any mistaking the location, but…』

『I’d heard the rumours, but it really is shocking, huh?』

『It really was a dangerous place, ey?』

Through the Intelligence Perusal screen, I saw the party of four sidestepping the touters with noncommittal replies, before looking up at the temple.
An ikemen swordsman with short blonde hair, a bishoujo nun, a voluptuous mage oneesan, and a swordsman with a good body.
Indeed. The slab thieves came back.
…Sorry, I meant, the Hero Party.

*imouto*

Back when I was still a human, they invaded the dungeon, and reaching as far as the No Life King’s boss room, they challenge… nobody, because they turned tail and went home; the muscle-brained Hero Party. Even though I had wondered when they would come challenge the place again, in the end they went off somewhere, but it seems that right now they were planning on tackling the dungeon a second time.

“These guys are your representatives?”

“Yes. Aside from the relevation to all of the Human Race, I also gave them a mission through the Sacred Sword.”

I asked Light God Sophia who was sitting next to me and looking at the screen as well, and she replied with a smile. I could see how much she trusted them through her expression. Certainly, they are the most talented amongst the people she has to move. I don’t know if he’s the only hero, or if there are more of them, but I don’t think there’s any doubt that they’re the pinnacle of the Human Race.
Considering that all the other challengers have collapsed before the 10th floor, I can agree that there isn’t much point if the challengers aren’t at least their level of strength.
But having said that, as somebody who knows how the last time went down, I just can’t understand how she can be so confident in them.

“They didn’t come even though all sorts of crazy stuff happened, so I thought they went on a journey somewhere, but?”

“Yes, they entered the Demon Territory and made it close to the Demon King Castle.”

“Yeah, basically to the front door after all, yanno?”

Even though they were about to challenge the last boss, you called them back here? How ruthless.
As somebody who became a hero through the “Sacred Goddess-sama’s” divine protection, he probably couldn’t refuse a direct request from her.

『But still, to think that you got a direct request from Sacred Goddess-sama, ey?』

『Yeah, she told me that this was even higher priority than then Demon King Subjugation, so it’s probably pretty important.』

『More important than the Demon King Subjugation… it’s pretty hard to even imagine, huh?』

『It was Sacred Goddess-sama’s esteemed words, so I think it must be a deep and thoughtful plan that we can’t even imagine.』

It’s true that it’s important, but somehow I’m really starting to sympathise for these guys.

Name:  Arc
Race:    Human Race
Sex:       Male
Age:      26
Job:       Swordsman
Level:   41
Title:      Hero of the Holy Sword

Name:  Zio
Race:    Human Race
Sex:       Male
Age:      28
Job:       Swordsman
Level:   35
Title:      None

Name:  Frey
Race:    Human Race
Sex:       Female
Age:      24
Job:       Mage
Level:   35
Title:      None

Name:  Widdi
Race:    Human Race
Sex:       Female
Age:      20
Job:       Cleric
Level:   34
Title:      None

I decided to try having a look at their statuses. As you’d expect, I don’t remember the details from last time, but I do recall that Arc’s level was in the 30s, so there’s no doubt that they’ve levelled up.
That was just how many fierce battles they had overcome to reach the Demon King, and just as they were about to challenge him… they were called back. When I imagined their hardships, it felt like tears were going to fall.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

The Hero Party didn’t overlook last time’s failure, and came completely prepared for camping, smoothly advancing as far as the 10th floor. But they’ve already reached the 10th floor once before, so this much was within my expectations. The issue is what happens from now on.
Will they finally overcome the puzzle that defeated them last time? Holding my breath in anticipation, I watched them reach the pedestal.

“What is that pedestal?”

“It’s a puzzle used to open the path to the 10th floor boss room, and unless you collect the stone slabs and put them in, the door won’t open.”

“Ahh, I see…”

When I answered Light God Sophia’s question, Leonora who was sitting beside me, face-palmed. Speaking of which, she spent a whole hour on this too, huh.
Incidentally, Dark God Anbaal wasn’t here today.

『…? Hasn’t the inscription changed from last time?』

『You’re right, Frey. Although the latter half is the same as previously, the first half has changed, hasn’t it.』

『Yeah but more important than that is how we’re gunna get it open, right? How’s the Holy Sword, Arc?』

『Give me a moment… I see. Apparently we just need to collect the stone slabs hidden on this floor and fit them in.』

!?

Hearing the unexpected conversation from beyond the screen, I let out a gasp, and turned towards Light God Sophia. And when I did, she averted her eyes. From what I saw, I immediately understood.

…This woman leaked the information she heard from me through her revelation.

“You cheater.”

“I am hurt. Giving advice through revelations was never forbidden.”

Certainly, it is within the rules. Using 『Authorities』 is forbidden, but we never forbade the use of relevations. But that doesn’t change the fact that it was unfair.

But still, this might be bad. I underestimated them because I thought that these muscleheads wouldn’t make it past the mid-floor puzzles, but if Light God Sophia supports them then it’s a different story.
With an Administrator’s Intelligence Perusal, they can look at all the information in the world, so with her help, the Hero Party will break through the puzzles in an instant.

Wait, hang on?
Then why did she go out of her way to ask me? If she knew how to solve the puzzle, then she wouldn’t have asked a question like that. In other words, even if she could see the puzzle itself, she didn’t know how to solve it.
In that case, as long as I don’t tell her the solution, the usefulness of her advice will become limited too.

“I’m not giving you any more hints.”

“That is a shame.”

Light God Sophia replied with an expression that didn’t seem to think it was that much of a shame at all. But well, she probably wasn’t so optimistic to think that my tongue would slip over and over after all, so I guess she was just trying to make a gain at the beginning.
It’s also a fact that even without clear answers, just having a third party’s advice should lower the puzzles’ difficult a lot.
I had thought that the middle layer’s puzzle floors would hold out for a year, but now the lower floors might have their turn too.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

After an hour of touring the 10th floor to collect the slabs, the Hero Party returned to the pedestal. The four members had a slab each, and were lined up in front of the pedestal.

Mn? Four slabs?
Why are there four? I should have only placed three of them.
Ah-, could it be that they continued to take care of that one slab that they ran away with last time? I’ve already changed the marks and replaced the slabs as well, so the slab from last time isn’t any use through.

『Now then, shall we put the slabs in already?』

『Yeah, in these three holes… Huh?』

『We have four slabs, but… Where does everyone else think the last one should be placed?』

『There doesn’t seem to be any other place to put it, huh.』

Apparently the Hero Party also noticed the odd number of slabs, because just as they were about to put the slabs into the pedestal, they began looking for another place to put a slab in instead.
Of course, there isn’t any such place.
Seeing them search every corner of the pedestal without finding anything, and even beginning to search the inside of the room made me want to hold my head. And then, as though it were natural, Arc began to hold the pommel of the sword to his forehead. Probably looking for Sacred Goddess Sophia’s advice.
Looking at this, once they go to the middle floors, won’t she be stuck guiding them the entire time? It feels like I can see a large sweat drop forming at the back of her head.

“Sophia, tell them to exclude the slab from last time.”

“Anri!?”

“…Are you fine with that?”

Hearing my suggestion, both Leonora and Light God Sophia raised voices of surprised. It’s true that I was taking back what I just said, but they were just so slow that I couldn’t bear to watch any longer. And what’s more, the fact that another slab was mixed in was unexpected, so there wasn’t any hint either, which is why I think just this much follow-up is fine.
Also, it isn’t as though I don’t gain anything from having them advance forward. Seeing whether or not they’ll be able to defeat the 10th floor boss should serve as a reference for how our match will go from now on. Or rather, I really don’t want to let them get away a second time.
It definitely wasn’t because I felt sorry for her when I saw her flustered at how to answer.

“Understood. Then I shall take you up on your words, Anri.”

After Light God Sophia advised Arc through a revelation, he explained the situation to his companions before throwing away last time’s slab and placing the remaining three into the pedestal.
Hey-, just because you don’t need it now, doesn’t mean you should just throw it away there. Won’t that just confuse other people?

The Hero Party unknowingly left a confusing gift for the future latecomers, before stepping through the newly opened doors to the throne room. I’d better take that slab back later, or else…


<Previous Chapter | Imouto | Next Chapter>

Book of God – 08

Chapter 8 – Invaders, or Rather, Customers

『Welcome!』

There are various dungeons across the world, but there is probably none that welcomes people with such a line.
If there was, then it would be plenty reason to question the sanity of that world’s inhabits.

Incidentally, the invaders, or rather, customers haven’t reached the dungeon yet. What awaits them is a trial of ambushing assassins that block their way. Using my power as an Administrator, the Intelligence Perusal, I was peeking o-, I mean, observing them.

『Mister, I recommend our inn!』

『No, come to ours!』

『We’ve got cute girls!』

『Weapons, armours, we have everything! Please come to our shop!』

『You’re missing medicinal herbs!? You mustn’t go to the dungeon without being fully prepared!』

『If you leave your things with us, you can fail in the dungeon without a problem! The storage store is this way!』

『Won’t you buy a map? without this the dungeon will be quite hard, you know!』

Indeed; the assassins known as touters.
Before they reach the dungeon, the challengers are exposed to the mad scramble for customers by the workers at the inns, shops, and storage stores in front of the dungeon. At this point, 9 out of 10 will drop out. Well, I say drop out, but it’s not like they die or get seriously injured or anything. They’re just a day late to the dungeon.
But still, these salespeople are all really formidable merchants. Are they really Evil God followers? Or could it be that I overly motivated them with my revelation the other day?

The small fraction of challengers that make it past the iron willed assassins, as well as the people that folded and come a day late can reach as far as the temple that serves as the entrance to the dungeon.
Hearing the words ‘Evil God Temple’, most people would be pretty cautious, but we don’t have gatekeepers or anything, and the doors are wide open.
However, lurking by the door are the second round of assassins.

And right now, a victim… Ah, my tongue slipped. Sorry, a new challenger had freshly arrived. And as though completely natural, the second round of assassins appeared before then.

『Do you believe in Anri-sama~!?』

『OWAH!? W-, who the heck are you.』

It was a blonde haired man in luxurious priest’s clothes… the Merry Pope Harvin. Any head of state should be really busy, but whenever new guests come, he often appears.

『Anri as in… the Evil God? Of course I don’t believe in something like that!』

Hearing his reaction, I basically thought “Well, yeah.” but the Pope looked up at the sky like it was the end of the world.

『Oohh, what sin! Anri-sama! Please grant these pitiful lambs your mercy.』

『Who the hell is a pitiful lamb!』

Please what?
By the way, this is a bit of a digression but this is his fifth time screaming those words today. There have also only been five batches of challengers today. And each time, the Pope had grieved like it was the end of the world. The challengers all yelled angrily at his words, but he wasn’t moved at all.

『I present this to you. A precious scripture copied personally by my hand. Please read this and learn of Anri-sama.』

While saying that, he took out a single book and handed it to the challenger. The man took the book by reflex, and accidentally accepted it.
…Indeed. He accepted it.

『The heck is… Wai-, UOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!? Ain’t this the Black Scripture? What the fuck have you done!』

Apparently the infamy of the scripture that I wrote is already well-known throughout the other countries, and so the man realised what had been handed to him. Once somebody accepts the cursed scriptures, they continually meet with misfortune until they transcribe a copy and hand it to somebody else, and apparently through this method, the scripture was already slowly spreading through the surrounding nations. …It’s a book of morals on how to live properly though.
When I showed Leonora the stuff I had written, the curse kicked in, which was how this whole thing started, but since I really do feel sorry for causing misfortune to befall others for no reason, I at least made sure to have the rules properly added onto on the back. Thanks to that, everyone immediately knew how to cope with it, and the recognition of the scriptures as a dangerous object quickly spread.
But still, just how many copies has he written. This is almost the 20th book he’s taken out of his pocket, today alone.

『I’LL REMEMBER THIS YOU FUCKERRRR!!!』

Leaving behind a clichéd line, the challenger ran out of the temple with the scripture in hand. I’m sure he’s gone to grab the things he needs to write a copy.
And like that, through the second round of assassins, the challenger who had finally made it to the dungeon dropped out as well, and once again, today the “Holy Land of the Evil God” continues to boast of being impregnable.

*imouto*

*imouto*

…Wai-, isn’t that bad? How is anything going to get done if everybody gets driven off at the entrance.
It’s great that the dungeon is impregnable and all, but I’ll be troubled if the guests give up and never come again. The first round of assassins──the touters──are fine since they’re just slowing them for a day, and aren’t driving them away. But the second round is no good.

“Divine Punishment.”

I teleported the tray from atop the table, to high above his head… right above it.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

『Haha, I truly apologise. I was a little too eager in my missionary work.』

I was conversing with the Pope across the screen, who now had a lump on his head. I’m thankful for his missionary work, but the way he’s doing things is terrible. No matter how you think about it, far from converting them, all it’s going to do is make them more hostile. Well, it might make them more fearful, so I might gain some faith through that instead though.

『Proselytising is fine, but chasing them away is forbidden. Rather than aiming for them when they come, it would be better to go for them when they leave.』

『I see! In other words, it would be easier for them to accept you after they experience your mighty power, Anri-sama. I am in much admiration of your wisdom.』

No, that’s not what I mean but… Well, whatever.

*imouto*

『Have all the visitors been human?』

『Yes. At the very least, I have not seen any demons that have made it as far as the temple.』

I asked the Pope about the challengers thus far, but apparently he hadn’t seen anybody from the demon side yet.
But I had predicted this to an extent. Where we are now was originally part of the Human Territory, so it was enemy territory for the Demon Race. If a large number of them came here at once, there would be the chance of the neighbouring countries overreacting, so the demons have no choice but to proceed with caution.

What’s more, looking at Leonora, the Human Race and Demon Race look basically the same. They don’t have horns or wings or anything. I asked her before, but at best you can only tell them apart through hair and eye colour. If they’re mixed, then the characteristics would average out, but as two races that were created as enemies, romantic relations between the two are pretty rare, so we should be able to tell them apart. But well, apparently thanks to taking in Summoned Heroes and the like, they’re gradually becoming mixed though.

My biggest worry would be a fight between humans and demons arising in the temple or the surroundings, but at the very least it doesn’t seem to be a worry at this moment in time. Having said that though, the Dark God set off the demon side as well, so this peace definitely won’t last forever. We need to stay on alert.

『Got it. I’ll continue to leave it to you.』

『Yes, understood. I shall convert them without fail.』

『No, like I said…』

『Oh, my apologies. I was to do so once they left, wasn’t it.』

Will things really be okay?

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

“Fumu. It is quite delicious today as well.”

“Huhu, we have plenty, so please do ask for seconds without reserve.”

“Nom nom.”

Tena and Leonora were off early for once, so Lili included, today we were able to eat together. Lately we’ve all been busy and haven’t been able to eat together, so it was a precious chance to do so.

“I see. It truly is delicious, isn’t it.”

“Hmm, ain’t bad, ey.”

“Y-, Yes! T-, Thank you very much.”

…If it wasn’t for these guys, that is.
why are they even here, these two gods. Even though they apparently didn’t need food, they’re sneakily eating ours. What was pitiful was that Tena was quite nervous.
Incidentally, Leonora’s been sitting next to the Dark God and bravely tending to him, while Lili was sitting on the Light God’s lap and being fed. The Dark God is unsociable, but wasn’t unkind to Leonora… It really is the chest huh. Is it her chest?
Leaving the jokes aside, the Light God was pampering Lili alone, and the Dark God was being kind to Leonora, so it was probably due to the patronage of their respective races. Their attitude towards Tena and I was clearly different. I don’t think it would kill them to be a little kinder to us though.

“What is the matter?”

“Hahhn?”

Perhaps because they noticed my gaze, the two of them spoke to me.

“Why are you here?”

“I’ve already given instructions to the Demon Race, so all that’s left is to watch em. So ain’t it better to be close then?”

“I am the same. And also, if I watch over them from up close, when it comes time, I will be able to save the lives of the challengers as well.”

Hang on a moment.
I get that you want to watch over the match from up close since it’ll determine everything from now on, but I can’t ignore that.

“…Are you going to be here the whole match?”

“Of course.”

“Ain’t it obvious?”

Can’t you go home?

“Is there some problem, Anri?”

“Anri-sama?”

Guh-, Leonora and Lili have been taken by the enemy.
I looked towards my final ally, Tena.

“…”

“…”

The silent conversation we had, 『Do something.』 『That’s impossible.』 was decided in an instant.

If the followers of the Sacred Light Church and the members of the Demon Race knew that the Light God and Dark God were staying in the Evil God Temple, I wonder if they would go insane.
While pondering things in a state close to escaping reality, I gave a deep, silent sigh.


<Previous Chapter | Imouto | Next Chapter>

Book of God – 07

Chapter 7 – Dungeon Restart

Ever since the revelation the other day, we began constructing the town around the temple again as a matter of urgent priority, and I was busy maintaining the dungeon that I had left alone for a while.
Ever since that day that I became the Evil God, not a single person has come to invade the dungeon with the temple built on top. It’s not like I deactivated anything, so in that respect the dungeon was still ready for people at this very moment, but since I may as well, I decided that I would perform maintenance on various things just in case.

Now then, with that as the preface, although this may be a little sudden, I’d like to change to the event that I’ve been waiting for.
Indeed. It’s time for the much awaited dragon summoning.

Dragon──the symbol of the strongest being that stands at the top of the fantasy world. Sometimes as the strongest enemy, sometimes as the most reliable ally, sometimes as the god that rules the world – though the position may change, the dragon is written as the strongest.
A majestic body and sharp fangs. Tough scales and claws that can tear apart any matter of being. And finally, great wings fitting of the ruler of the skies. With just one breath, they can blow apart a great army, and are sometimes able to make free use of even powerful magic. The strongest monster, the dragon, is such a being.

You can roughly split them into the lizard-like western dragons, and the snake-like eastern dragons, but it really has to be a western dragon, I think. I think there are all sorts of dragon fans, so there might be people who disagree, but at the very least, right now I’m the one doing the summoning so I’ll choose the way I like.

*imouto*

Or so I was faintly thinking, as I performed the preparations for the dragon summoning.

It’s a dragon after all, so I’m sure it’ll definitely be huge.
It might be a little dangerous to summon it in the office where the dungeon core is. The truth is I made that kind of mistake during the summoning for the 20th floor’s orichalcum Living Armour, and I have bitter memories of having the room half-destroyed. I won’t make the same mistake again.
Instead of the immobile main core, I held the portable subcore and teleported to the 30th floor boss room to summon the dragon. Even if I summon it somewhere else I’ll have to teleport it here anyway, so it saves time just to summon it here to begin with.

*imouto*

The room has been the same ever since the day that I met with Leonora here. The throne is human-sized and unsuited to the dragon I’m going to summon, but I’ll think about changing the room after the summoning to match it.

“Dungeon Create.”

I muttered so with the subcore in my hand, and a window appeared.
I chose the “summon” entry from it, and from various monster categories, I picked “dragon type”. And when I did, a list with various pictures of dragons and their parameters appeared. Fire dragons and water dragons and earth dragons and wind dragons – I felt like grinning just by looking at the lineup, but I worked hard to keep cool.
Since I’m going to summon one anyway, I’ll go with the strongest. Since the day I became a divine, my mana’s just been piling up without any chance to use it, so I can pick whatever dragon I want. It was possible to sort the list by the amount of mana used, so I looked at the one with the biggest value… How cool. He looks strong. I’ll go with him.

“Summon Dragon.”

It’s not like I needed to say that, but it just came out of my mouth.
When I began summoning, a gargantuan magic circle of 20m diameter appeared in front of me. When the magic circle flickered, an enormous amount of magic gathered above it, and space seemed to warp. And then, something giant began to show itself from that warp.
That giant being let out a roar before my expectant eyes.

“PIKYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!”

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Why did this happen.
There’s no better way to word my feelings. I just stood there dumbfounded, gazing at the tragedy before me.

A majestic body and sharp fangs. Tough scales and claws that can tear apart any matter of being. And finally, great wings fitting of the ruler of the skies. A dragon with all of these things was cowering in a corner of the room, hiding its face against the wall. Literally the Japanese phrase, ‘covering your head and leaving your bottom exposed’.

Black Dragon Vardneel.

500,000,000 mana points; an amount that surpasses just plain harassment, and is at a level where you just lose interest in summoning him to begin with. The most powerful and wicked dragon that had materialised in exchange for that ridiculous amount of mana let out a screech the moment he appeared on the magic circle, and as good as dashed away from me like a startled hare.

Mn, it’s not as though I didn’t have some faint idea that this would happen.
Lately I’ve only been talking to humans and demons, as well as divines who it didn’t work on at all so I totally forgot about its existence, but the description for the Evil God Aura skill certainly did say “has enough power to send a dragon running frantically”.
I acknowledge this. I acknowledge this, but it really is cruel.
Even though I’ve been looking forward to this… always looking forward to this…

I was even uncharacteristically excited while daydreaming about what would happen once the strongest dragon had my divine protection. But looking at him, it seems completely impossible that he’d accept me from the heart. And in fact, just taking a step forward from where I was standing had him tremble with a start, and frantically press himself further up the wall to escape.
Ah-, he’s finally showing his belly.
Don’t want. I don’t want the strongest dragon’s submission pose. I’m begging you, so don’t destroy my yearning towards dragons any further.

No matter how I thought about it, staying here wouldn’t better the situation at all, so in disappointment I left the room.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆

Instead of returning to the office, I just teleported to the temple on the 5th surface floor.
There are plenty of things that I needed to do besides the dragon summoning, but I’m feeling really discouraged.
Laying down on the canopy bed in my room, I hugged my pillow and buried my face in it.

“Anri-sama?”

Hearing a lisping voice call out to me, I… had a look without looking that way. Apparently Lili had been in my room reading a book. She’s sharing a room with Tena, but lately Tena’s been busy and can’t look after her, so Lili’s been spending a lot of time in my room. I didn’t notice she was here, so I showed her something a little uncool.
I got up and was about to turn to Lili and reply, when I hesitated because I had no idea what to say.
Perhaps she noticed because Lili closed the book she had been reading, and then trotted up to me from the table.

“Anri-sama, what’s wrong? Are you sad?”

Apparently she realised my depressed atmosphere.
She asked me that while patting my head, so my eyes grew a little hot.

“It’s fine, there was just something a little sad.”

I soothed Lili, and patted her chestnut hair back. Lili narrowed her eyes comfortably.
I was finding Lili’s actions lovely, when I suddenly noticed that she still had her collar, and unconsciously frowned.
She hasn’t been blessed with my divine protection the same way Tena has, so she’s still a human. That’s fine in and of itself, but the problem is that she’s still a slave. When I became a divine, Tena joined the Apostle Race as well and was freed from her slave status. I considered that the same thing might happen if I gave Lili my divine protection as well, but there’s the possibility that apostles are immortal, so I was hesitant to change her at her current age.
If I can learn to use my 『Authorities』 decently, then I think I’ll be able to release her from being a slave without changing her from a human, but it’s impossible at the moment.

I removed my eyes from her collar, and spoke to her after changing gears.

“Are you studying, Lili?”

“Yeah, I was reading the book.”

“Good girl. I’ll read it out to you.”

“Really!?”

It would probably be better as study for her to read a book herself, but just a little bit as thanks for cheering me up should be okay.
Finding it charming that Lili’s eyes were glittering in excitement, I nodded in reply. It feels that my heart that had splintered from that shocking event was now being healed.

“What kind of book were you reading?”

“This.”

Lili held out the book that she had been reading.
I looked at the title of the book.

『The Girl and the Dragon』

No more.


<Previous Chapter | Imouto | Next Chapter>

The Bathroom Goddess – Chapter 7

Red, pink, yellow and green. These small and vibrant beanbags were made from lots of small cloth pieces sewn together, and when you tossed them they would roll in a dizzying array of colours.
Normally, even simply playing with  beanbags would feel more difficult when you were sitting in a bath, with hot water up past your waist.
There were six hahanero beanbags. When Izumi had heard that they would prevent mould she eagerly chose them, but her shoulders were now drooped in realisation of her own thoughtlessness. Although the hahanero was dried, they were still ground spices. Izumi realised that a bathroom would immediately fill with moisture. She had considered preserving them in something airtight, but then that would be meaningless. Prepared for one of them to become ruined, she left it in a bucket, but fortunately, right now it still felt the same as always.
It was about time to try adding another one.

Just as she was about to put another beanbag in, the moment she reached out for the bucket, the window quietly opened.

On her seventh try, the shock had become weak.

Feeling something akin to ‘This again?’, Izumi looked towards the window.

Brown hair that reached past the shoulders, and mysteriously coloured purple-grey eyes; there stood a child with an androgyny that made them seem like both a boy and a girl.

A medallion that hung from the neck to the stomach now shone in reflection of the bathroom light.

The child surveyed the bathroom with terribly cold eyes, looked at Izumi, and then scoffed.

“A witch, huh. You are too far past your prime to tempt me. Try again.”

“HAHH!?”

With the beanbag in her hand, Izumi stood up.

“Who the heck is supposed to be a witch. Even if somebody begged me I wouldn’t tempt a cheeky brat like you.”

“A sore loser huh. What manner of being could invade this tower but a witch.”

“A company employee!”

Seeing the sneering child―――who was apparently a boy―――Izumi threw out her chest and answered. And then came back to her senses.

No matter how detestable child a he might have been, her appearance was unacceptable. Izumi looked down at her own body and paled.

The first time she had been in such shock at having her window connected to some strange world that she didn’t really feel embarrassed. The second time she was wearing clothing, and as for the third time, although she felt a little self-conscious she immediately broke past it. After all, they were all people she would never see again. There wasn’t any real problem in being seen. That was how she had begun to feel. But when it came to a child, that was a different matter. As an adult who ought to be setting a role-model, it was embarrassing to be standing chest high, legs apart in the nude.

“H-, Hang on a little.”

Leaving the beanbag on the windowsill, she headed into the changing room.

After wrapping a bath towel around her body and hurriedly heading back to the bathroom, she found that the boy had taken the beanbag in hand and was staring at it curiously.

“…Do you like it?”

The boy suddenly averted his gaze from the beanbag.

“Of course not.”

Really?
Even as he spat out “Who would like this kind of thing?” he still held onto it tightly.

“If you want it, I’ll give it to you. As an apology for surprising you.”

Saying that while sitting on the edge of the bathtub, she was glared at by the boy.

“I wasn’t surprised.”

It was true that when they saw each other, the boy hadn’t shown a surprised expression. Izumi inwardly praised the boy’s firm guts for not being surprised despite a naked woman suddenly appearing.

Although the boy’s navy jacket was a little dirty, it was finely embroidered. From that, you could tell at a glance that it was probably expensive. Even the shirt beneath was decently strong, and gleamed like silk. He was also wearing form-fitting beige pants, and high-laced leather boots. It was an outfit like that of a noble boy from long ago.

Izumi returned her gaze to the boy’s face.

“Well, isn’t it fine? I still have some, so I’ll give you that one.”

“And what do you want in exchange? My lifespan? My seed?”

Izumi winced at the boy’s scornful gaze.

“I told you that I wasn’t a witch, didn’t I. What the heck do you mean ‘seed’? Hurry up and drop that kind of idea already.”

“Look, I’m not even naked any more.” she said, as she pointed at the towel. The boy snorted again.

“Aren’t you only covering your breast and waist.”

“No, well, yeah you’re right but… I’m covering all the places that need covering, so isn’t it fine…”

Mumbling a reply, Izumi realised that she was a disadvantage, so her gaze loitered around behind the boy instead.

The first thing that entered her vision was the huge number of paper rolls around the room. Some stuffed in a basket, some leant against the wall, some laying on the floor. The boy’s room was filled with them.

The next thing she noticed was the light that illuminated those papers. When she bent forward and looked up to find the source of it, she found that about three meters up the wall were countless 10cm rectangular holes. Turning her gaze even further up, she saw a dome-shaped ceiling.

When she looked back down again, Izumi sighed in wonder. The entire room, ceiling included, had been built from stone. The stone became larger and larger the further down they were, and by the time it reached the floor, the stones were easily larger than a person could hold.

There was a large, thick desk in the middle of the room, as well as chests and benches lined up by the wall. Beneath their feet was a rug of complicated and detailed designs, and although it was showy, it brought about a solid sense of dignity to the room.

There was a large black hole at the edge of the carpet. Looking closely, Izumi realised that they were stairs that led to the lower floors.

Izumi’s heart danced with excitement at this room that gave the feeling of being in an ancient castle.

“What are you thinking, smirking like that, you damned witch.”

Izumi looked at the boy who had sunk her exhilarated heart to ground with just his one line.

Catching sight of the beanbag in his hand, Izumi snickered.

Stretching her hand into the bucket, she picked up two beanbags.

“I got these beanbags the other day. Do you know how to play with them?”

“I don’t.” brusquely replied the boy. In her mind, Izumi pumped her fist in victory.

“Big sis will show you how.”

Like this, showed Izumi, as she tossed the beanbag above her head. While the beanbag was in the air, she moved the other beanbag from her left hand to her right, before throwing that in the air as well. After Izumi repeated this a number of times, she called out to the boy.

“I wonder if you can do it too,” she said in a babying voice. “It looks easy, but it’s difficult until you know the trick to it, you know.”

The boy turned sullen, and looked at the beanbag resting on his palm.

“Aren’t you just tossing it. I can do that much.”

Just as he said, the boy tossed the beanbag into the air. Despite that, or perhaps just as expected, the beanbag went too high, and while the boy was focused on catching it, he did nothing with the beanbag in his left hand.

“Hohohohoho,” resounded Izumi’s laughter. “You really are just tossing it huh. There’s no point in having two of them in that case.”

The boy wordlessly tossed the beanbag into the air again. This time to a good height. But when he tried to move the beanbag from his left hand to his right, it fell.

“Seee? It’s difficult, isn’t it. Shall I tell you the trick to it?”

Izumi crossed her arms, and leant on the windowsill.

“Unnecessary.”

The boy once again tossed the beanbag. He managed both the right height, and the move from his left hand to his right. He managed to catch the falling beanbag in his left hand too. But he stopped there.

“Oh? you did it. But there’s no point if you stop there.” said Izumi sarcastically.

“I’ll show you this time.”

The boy had completely taken it seriously.

He tossed a beanbag, and changed another from his left hand to his right. Catching the first in his left hand, he tossed up the one in his right. After clumsily repeating it a number of times, in no time, his movements began to become smooth.

“How’s this.”

Seeing the boy declare so triumphantly, Izumi bore with the urge to burst into laughter.

“Still a long way to go. Next is doing it with one hand.”

Izumi tossed and caught two beanbags with her right hand.

The boy tried imitating her, and tossed the beanbag.

Although it took more time than last time, the boy had mastered it one-handed, and was now tossing them easily.

Izumi began adding beanbags from the bucket.

“Next is three.”

Izumi tossed them carefully so that they wouldn’t fall in the bath. The beanbags flew into the air, one by one. Just how many years had it been since she had enjoyed herself by doing this seriously? She recalled how as a child she became frustrated with it, and single-mindedly practising.

Seeing the sore loser of a boy struggle with three beanbags, Izumi was finally unable to bear it, and burst into laughter.

A beanbag flew from the hand of the surprised boy, and fell into the table.

He glared at Izumi.

“What’s so amusing?”

“No, it’s just that at first I thought you weren’t like a child at all, but when you’re playing like that, you really are a child, huh.”

For a moment, the boy’s glare intensified. But then he immediately looked towards the fallen beanbag, and suddenly laughed.

“Witches sure have a lot of spare time, huh. You came all the way here to play with me? What’s fun about playing with children?”

His words were harsh, but his tone had softened quite a bit.

“It seems like the third will take a while for me.”

The boy picked up the beanbag from atop the table. In that moment, a paper that had been spread over the table fell to the ground.

Drifting left and right as it fell, it flew close to the window, and Izumi hurriedly caught it. It would be terrible for it to fall in the bath.

“This dropped.”

Seeing the paper as she was about to hand it to the boy, Izumi’s eyes widened.

“This is…”

“It’s a map, and…?”

The boy tilted his head.

Izumi paid no heed to the boy’s puzzled gaze, and looked hard at the paper in her hands.

On the paper was something like a fat and rounded cross. The cross itself was broken into various parts, with words written on it.

“What an interesting shape. Hey, whereabouts is this place on the map?”

The boy peered in on the map.

“If I said that we were in Ii’Jibro, would you understand?”

“Nope, not at all.”

The boy looked at Izumi, dumbfounded.

“Are witches unable to read maps?” he asked, as he pointed to a red portion, a little distance below the middle of the cross.

“Ii’Jibro is this red portion.”

“I see.” nodded Izumi.

If each colour represented a nation, then it made this quite an extensive map.

In that case, there might be some of the countries that she knew. Izumi dug out from her memory the names of the countries spoken by the people she had met.

“Is Yohk’Zai on the map?”

“Here,” pointed the boy, to a spot to Ii’Jibro’s upper-right. It was close by.

“Huhu.” laughed Izumi, as she recalled Teo Keh’s large belly. She wondered if he managed to meet the stranded man in blue.

“What about Triht?”

Following with another question, the boy plucked out the map from Izumi’s hand.

“Hey!” she complained. “I still wanted to look. What are you doing?”

As though finding it troublesome, the boy spoke as he rolled up the map.

“Stand up, and stretch out your arms.”

“Eh?”

“I’ll teach you how to remember the map. Just stand up and spread your arms.”

It wasn’t like she particularly wanted to learn geography.

But since he was willing to teach her, and she couldn’t think of any reason to refuse, Izumi stood up in the bath and spread both arms.

“Listen up. Your right breast is Yohk’Zai. Your neck is Triht, and your head is the country ruled by the dragons, and the country rumoured to be a paradise, Jebas. Under your right breast near your liver is Ii’Jibro. Crowded near your left breast are a lot of small countries. Near the biceps of your right arm is Insen, from your elbow to your wrist is Uchu, and your hand is Kouzen. Your left bicep is Sunayu, and from your left elbow to your wrist is Dohji. And then…”

“Wait!”

With the boy continuing on and on, Izumi asked him to stop.

“It’s impossible, I can’t remember all that. I’m fine just knowing where Yohk’Zai and Triht are.”

They were all the names of completely unfamiliar countries after all. Izumi’s hippocampus was already screaming in defeat.

The boy laughed.

“You’re quite different from the witches in the legends. Are you really a witch?”

Apparently the laughing boy didn’t hear Izumi say “No, like I said, I’m not a witch.”.

After laughing for a while, the boy walked to the wall and tossed the map into one of the baskets.

The light coming in from above had changed to the light of the evening.

The stone room was wrapped in a dim red light, and gave warmth to the cold and inorganic stones.

If she was a witch, then the boy walking through the rays of light was like a fairy, thought Izumi.

“What an elegant room. Did you say this was a tower?”

The boy nodded at Izumi’s murmur.

“Indeed. People call it the Tower of the Silent Sinner.”

“…That’s quite the name.”

Since the name seemed to have quite a background, Izumi’s face stiffened.

Now that she had heard the name, she couldn’t help but see this elegant castle room as a prison to cage in a criminal. But for a prison, its furnishings were much too luxurious. After tilting her head in wonder for a while, Izumi muttered “Ahh.” and nodded. If she took this to be a prison to cage in those of high status, then everything fit. For example, like the boy in front of her…

“Could it be that you’re imprisoned in here?”

She wanted him to deny it. There was no way she could overlook something as cruel as imprisoning a child in a tower. But Izumi had no power to help him. Even if she sheltered him on her side, his prison would just be changed to this small bathroom instead.

“Indeed.”

Izumi’s hopes were easily betrayed.

The boy nodded as though it were no big deal.

“Did you commit some sort of wrongdoing? And so they locked you up here for a day?” asked Izumi, hoping for the best.

“It’s almost been a year since I was put in here.”

Izumi didn’t know what to say any more.

A small laugh reached Izumi’s ears as she hung her head.

She raised her face to find that the boy was looking at her with a self-mocking smile, unsuited for a child his age.

“I was unable to stop my father from marrying a woman who hid her ugliness and desire under her beauty, and following his death, my step-mother easily took the power from me. I suppose you could say that was my wrongdoing.”

She knew why he was so calm now.

He had surely experienced a harsh life that she couldn’t even imagine. No, even now, he was in the middle of that kind of life. Even though he was still a child young enough to take juggling seriously, he was hurriedly trying to grow up.

“Don’t you have any way to leave here? If there’s anything I can help with…”

Izumi cut her words short. Even if he did escape, wouldn’t it just be endangering his life?

The boy looked up at the sky, through the tiny, tiny holes.

“Long ago, back in Ii’Jibro’s most prosperous era, the king in those days, the Wise King, was said to have created this tower. One day, the strong and intelligent king was out in town when he heard a beautiful singing voice. The owner of the voice was a beautiful girl, and the king had his heart taken by her at first sight. But the girl had both husband and child. The girl refused the king, and the king flew into a rage. He killed the husband, took the children, and created a tower to imprison the girl. So that the girl was unable to escape, he locked the tower, and always kept the key by him. Since the day she was imprisoned in the tower, in her deep sadness, the girl never let out a single sound. But the king didn’t try to understand the girl’s grief. Each day he came to the tower to visit the beloved girl, and he neglected his duties as a king. Ii’Jibro was on the road to decline… There are theories that in the end the king killed the girl and ended his own life, as well as theories about the children coming to save their mother. The key that the foolish king kept with him is this one.”

The boy held up the medallion hanging from his neck. The sounds of the thin chain rang out.

“Eh? That’s the key? Why do you have it?”

“In the days of the Wise King, they had techniques far beyond our current ones. Locking the door doesn’t require the key. The only key is this one, and you can only unlock it from outside. She probably wanted me to taste despair. Before that woman closed the door, she smiled and threw this in at me. Even if my step-mother dies, I won’t ever be able to step outside again.”

“That can’t be…”

Izumi looked up at the hole above her.

“What about that hole!?”

The boy shook his head.

“The key is larger. It’s impossible.”

“What about your food? You’ve been stuck here for a whole year, so there should be a window or door for the food, right?”

“Why do you think all the books here are curled up?”

Izumi caught her breath.

“…Because the only holes are small enough that only curled paper can go through?”

It felt to Izumi like the boy nodded in slow motion.

How cruel. What a cruel thing to do with a child like this.

“My life here isn’t bad enough to grieve about. I have a water well downstairs, and there is sewage disposal as well. I have meals brought to me three times a day, and as you can see I have books to kill time.”

If only it hadn’t been impossible to leave the bathroom, then the boy could have lived freely, even if in a different world…
Izumi stood there wordlessly. And then the boy suddenly took the key from his neck.

“Witch. Come a little closer.”

Izumi did as she was told.

The boy passed Izumi’s neck through the chains with the key.

“I had fun. This is my thanks.”

Before Izumi could tell him to wait, the boy shut the window.


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Bathroom Goddess is getting an LN

So yeah. WN is getting taken down on the same day that EGA is getting released, but I’ll save them to my hdd, so no worries.

If anybody wants to give me money to buy the EGA, Bathroom Goddess or Tilea novels simply because I’m amazing (lol), have an amazing personality (lolol) and they love me, please leave me a comment, and I’ll get back to you (to take away your money).

I promise to finish the Bathroom goddess and EGA web novel translations at least. (:

Tilea’s Worries – Chapter 18

A circle (サークル;saakuru) in Japan is a term for a common-interest club.


Chapter 18 – The Demonic Evil Three are coming to pick a fight

“Tilea-sama! Tilea-sama!”

I heard Pervert(Nielsen)’s loud shouts, early in the morning. As for me, I was in the restaurant kitchen, sighing as I looked at the pot that was boiling over.

“So this is where you were, Tilea-sama. There is grave news! The Demonic Evil Three are――”

“Not, ‘grave news’ damnittttt!”

No sooner had Pervert(Nielsen) come had I grabbed his face in one hand. And as though it were an iron claw, I began conspicuously squeezing his face with my hand.

“GUOHHHH! A-, As expect of Tilea-sama… Y-, Your great strength is in good heal, th.”

Despite suffering, Pervert(Nielsen) skilfully praised me.

Hahh~ Honestly, this guy is…

I had instructed Pervert(Nielsen) to “stop the fire when the pot boils”; something that even children in primary school would know. But apparently this idiot had left the pot alone and run off somewhere.
What “Grave news, Tilea-sama!”. I don’t care if it’s Demonic Evils, or Ebonic Weevils, but the shop is more important!

What should I do for today’s training?

And I need to open to the store in about an hour too…

I won’t make it if I need to make the stock from scratch again. Should I just throw Pervert(Nielsen) into the pot and make Pervert(Nielsen) stock?

I’m so angry that it feels like I’ll destroy Pervert(Nielsen). I’ll beat Pervert(Nielsen)’s head in, and then… No good, no good. What kind of crazy things am I thinking about now. I have to hurry up and chant the magic spell!

Pervert(Nielsen) is a chuunibyou so it cannot be helped. Pervert(Nielsen) is a chuunibyou so it cannot be helped.――It cannot be helped.

……
…………
………………

Alright, I’ve somehow got my anger under control.

Phew, can’t be helped. I’ll explain to dad, and explain to the customers that we’ll be opening a little late. I’m cleaning up after Pervert(Nielsen) again. Honestly, I can’t even leave you to watch the pot, can I!

I’ve pretty much run out of anything I think I can entrust to him. I glared at him, saying “Honestly…” with my eyes. Pervert(Nielsen) seemed to have something he wanted to say as well.

He was looking at me with sad eyes like an abandoned puppy desperately appealing to his owner.

…Guess it can’t be helped. Although the possibility is infinitely close to zero, there might really be something terrible happening. I guess I’ll give him a chance to explain why he was ditching work.

“Well? What’s this grave news? I expect that it’s something urgent enough that you neglected your work, yes?”

“Yes Milady. I deserve ten thousand deaths for running counter to your commands. However, it was a problem that required emergency measures. Although it was presumptuous of me, I gave my judgement priority and left the shop to confirm the intelligence.”

Hahh? Is this guy trying to use Sun Tzu’s “A general on the field shall not obey his sovereign.” or something? Are you trying to use that convenient interpretation to continue to skip work!

The anger that I had kept down exploded outwards again.

No, wait. Wait. Maybe I should just listen to the end first. I need to let him finish reciting his death haiku, after all.

“Well then, specifically speaking, what is this problem that required emergency measures?”

“Milady. It seems that Hidler unsealed the Demonic Evil Three. It is likely that they will attack in the near future.”

Goodness. Somebody is coming to complain to Timu yet again…?

Just the other day was Garm, and this time it’s the Demonic Evil Three? And yet again, quite a chuuni-esque name. Honestly, even though I had thought we’d basically solved the problem with Garm’s incident…

But, it can’t be helped. There’s no way to deal with claimants except to talk to them one by one. You might even be able to clear up their feelings of ill reserve by talking to them. Even that Garm guy started off with pranks, but it seems that they made up in the end.

Gyangu, was it?

Apparently Timu was given Garm’s pet. As a symbol of apology, I suppose. If he even gave his beloved dog away, I wonder just how close they’ve gotten.

The Demonic Evil Three…

So it’s three people this time? I wonder what kind of people they are?

“Niel. What kind of people are those Demonic Evil Three?”

“They are group with cruel and ferocious natures. Because they were so lawless, Demon King Zorg sealed them away himself.”

“Can I take that to mean that they did nothing but outrageous things and were expelled from the Demon King Army?”

“Indeed. Only, they were not expelled, but sealed.”

“Yes, yes, sealed was it? So why did this sealed group suddenly come back?”

“Starting with Camilla-sama’s secession from the Demon King Army, they then lost Killer, and then Garm. The Demon King Army was continuing in a weakening direction. It was likely an act of desperation on Hidler’s part.”

EH!? Killer-san and Garm quit as well!?

Ahh~ But after all these troubles happened, I guess they didn’t feel too good about it either. Although they made up with Timu, they might have gotten tired of dealing with other people. To begin with, people who quit a circle always do so with this kind of timing.

I see. When Timu left the Demon King Army, all of Timu’s praetorian guard quit together, so the “Let’s pretend to be the Demon King Army” gathering lost a lot of people.

Then Killer-san, and even Garm quit as well, so the gathering was on the verge of being called off. At that point, Hidler-san reluctantly decided to call back the expelled members I guess. But if that gentle Hidler-san ‘sealed them’ by the name of the Demon King, in other words, expelled them from the circle, then they must’ve done something pretty bad.

I wonder what on earth they did.

An image is coming to mind…

『Yo, yo, we’re the fearsome Demonic Evil Three. -PARARIKOPARARIKO-

『Mama, there are some strange people.』

『Miya-chan, you mustn’t look at them!』

『Geez~ What’s with those guys? They’ll wake up the babies!』

『There are houses around. Don’t kick up so much dust. You’ll get the laundry dirty!』

『Demonic Evil Three; you’ll cause trouble to other people. Please act with prudence.』

『Heh! Get with the act, Hidler! We’re the atrocious Demon King Army, yanno.』

『Yeah, yeah! Let’s go even faster! We’ll touch the skies!
-VROOM VROOM-

Probably something like that. I think I have a pretty good idea for now.

――So they exist in this world as well! No, of course they do. Those type of people pop up no matter where you go. A bunch that lack common sense and just cause trouble to society…

The Demonic Evil three are delinquents; the so-called ‘DQN'(dokyun).

“In other words, they’re dokyun.”

“Oneesama, what is this ‘dokyun’?”

Oh! At some point Timu joined our conversation as well. Good timing. Since she’s a related party, I’ll explain dokyun to Timu as well.

“You see, in my past life, ‘dokyun’ is what we called lawless scum.”

“A perfect fit for the Demonic Evil Three, isn’t it.”

“Yep. These troublesome kids existed in my past life as well, and we really didn’t know what to do with them. Honestly, they popped up everywhere.”

“T-, There were that many of these powerful beings in your old world!?”

Pervert(Nielsen) asked in shock. You don’t have to be that surprised. They’re people that pop up in every world, right?

“Yeah, heaps and heaps. There were so many that they popped up absolutely everywhere.”

“As expected of Oneesama! To have battled each day with such powerful beings!”

“Indeed. I am always amazed and in admiration of Tilea-sama’s mighty strength.”

Honestly, they were so troublesome. Late at night they’d loiter in huge numbers around the convenience store. In the middle of the night they’d ride past with their thunderous modified motorbikes. And they’d beat and kick and mug anybody they had an eye on.

Just now much of my Dark Matter funds were lost because of dokyun!

The unpleasant memories from my old life came to mind.

I see. In that case, it is as grave a matter as Nielsen said. There’s a need to make sure of it even at the cost of work. So even Pervert(Nielsen) can be useful on occasion.

“It certainly was a grave matter. Niel, well done in reporting it to me.”

“I am extremely and humbly delighted for your honourable understanding.”

A group of dokyun are coming to complain about Timu’s withdrawal. No, their aim is probably something else. I’m sure that once they found out that Timu was a bishoujo, their real intention was to come start some trouble with her.

That’s definitely it. You dokyun bastards, I won’t let you lay a single finger on my cute sister!

I need a plan, don’t I. First, I can’t let mum and dad be troubled, so I want to deal with this before it affects the store.

Plan Number 1. Rely on Remilia-san.

Remilia-san is an S-ranked adventurer, as well as the a member of the national public safety force. Honestly speaking, one or two dokyun would be a piece of cake to Remilia-san.
But the main problem with this plan was whether or not the public safety force would even bother with such a small incident. Honestly speaking, it’s probably impossible. If it was a huge incident that affected the country then it would be another matter, but they wouldn’t even listen to an issue about delinquents coming to complain. At best, they would tell me to “go have a talk with your town guards”.

Plan Number 2. Rely on Loser(Bizef).

In my mind, Loser(Bizef)’s stock is on a nose-dive. But Loser(Bizef) is a former adventurer. He’s like the police in this town. Leaving his actual strength aside, his authority is splendid. If he told the dokyun who he was and threatened them with “I’ll arrest you!”, the dokyun might become obedient. But Bizef is a loser. If he fainted before he gave them a warning, it would be completely meaningless.

…No, no. It’s fine, it’ll be fine. Even though it was just an illusion, he still fainted because it was a dragon. He wouldn’t faint to a bunch of delinquents; a bunch of dokyun, right?
Probably. I really want to believe so.

Plan Number 3. Talk it out with the dokyun.

Well, it’d be a frontal approach, huh. Pervert(Nielsen) and I would confront them and negotiate. But a sincere and earnest attitude wouldn’t work on them. On the contrary, showing them that kind of attitude would just get us taken advantage of. We need to show our power while we negotiate. Right. While negotiating, we need to make them think ‘These guys are trouble. We’ll be in for a painful time. I don’t want to get involved with them anymore.’.

In the end, Plan Number 1 is impossible to carry out. We’ll go with Plan Number 2. If that fails, then I guess we’ll go with Plan Number 3. Also, I guess the last thing I need to know is how strong they are? Well, they wouldn’t be as strong as an adventurer, but they definitely have as much strength as the delinquents in our town.

Our war power consists of me, Pervert(Nielsen), Loser(Bizef), and Timu.

First of all, “me”…

I’ve been training my body through cooking ever since I was young. I think that I’d be above average in a one-on-one fight with the town delinquents. Only, I don’t think I’d have much confidence if there was more than one. I mean, my specs are still that of a 17 year old girl.

Next is “Pervert(Nielsen)”…

His enthusiasm is always great, but his strength is on the level of a primary schooler. I’m sure he’ll be taken down in one hit by a dokyun. Since his appearance is that of a dandy old gentleman, I really can’t help but feel regret. Anyway, he can’t be counted on in a fight, in other words. He’s just here to make us look bigger.

Next is Loser(Bizef)…

Recently I found out that he was a joke adventurer. His only redeeming feature is that he was a C-ranked adventurer, and his current position as the chief of the town guard. It would be perfect if the dokyun were scared by his title. But if they’re the type that go “The cops ain’t nothin’!” and act cool, then it’d have the opposite effect. And what’s more, if they found out how weak Loser(Bizef) actually was, then the dokyun would get cockier and cockier. He really wouldn’t be helpful.

Finally, “Timu”…

She can use magic, and she’s pretty fast on her feet too. Among our group, she seems like she’d be the most useful. If we had her hide in the back, then she could fire off magic as a distraction when the time comes.
But I don’t want her to be in danger. I guess it really would be best to have her stay at home, while I go with just Pervert(Nielsen) and Loser(Bizef).

Huhu, what’s with this? Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. Aren’t I the most reliable one right now?


“A general on the field shall not obey his sovereign.”
Basically a saying that states that in a war, the general onsite should be the one who makes the decisions, as the monarch in the capital has already entrusted said general with the task. Accredited to Sun Tzu.


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Kitaseno-sensei’s comments on EGA Cover Illustration

Thank you as always for your support.
This is Kitaseno Yunaki.

The illustration drawn by Yuzuki Kihiro-sama has been released on the Official Narou Contest website!
The splendidness of this illustration is better seen than described, so it would probably be faster if you saw it for yourself, don’t you think?
*imouto*
書籍版「邪神アベレージ」最新情報掲載ページ
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Now then, for those of you who have seen the cover illustration, there is a little quiz I would like to give you.
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Q:Who is the protagonist of this series?
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Yes, it’s Anri-san, isn’t it.
Well then, about Anri-san’s position on the cover illustration, please take one more look.
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Anri-san? No matter how you look at is, she has the
LAST BOSS’ POSITION.
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Normally on the cover, the protagonist or heroine stand at the front, but Anri-san is at the very back… in other words, in the background. The way this is drawn can only be said to be outside of the norm.
When I was first handed the illustration drawn by Yuzuki-sama, I thought in disappointment;
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These people really understand!
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Eh? Wasn’t I disappointed with the illustration?
It’s more of a “Damn, they really got me.” sort of meaning.
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Now then, please look at the last boss’Anri-san’s eyes.
She’s a normal bishoujo isn’t she. Both dignified and beautiful isn’t she.
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To those of you who see this and think, “Huh. She doesn’t look mean at all. What a let down.” I say this to you… How naive.
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This is her normal mode, or in other words, her this-is-how-she looks-once-it’s-been-through-a-camera-and-picture form.
As for a picture drawn to the image of what somebody who had seen her in the eyes pictures her as…
Unfortunately, people would get angry if I revealed too much, so I shall end the spoilers here.
If you want to see, please buy the book and check for yourself. (Shameless advertising.)
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Incidentally, with Anri-san stuck in the last boss position, the delicious parts were taken by Miss Leonora.
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I actually wanted to comment on the spine, and the back cover and stuff as well, but because they weren’t released publicly, please wait for the real thing.


TL Note: You better buy the damn book.

Buying LNs (Otoburi, Tilea, EGA)

CDJapan boasts an English interface, and pretty cheap prices.

I’m not sure why it never occurred to me to update the links, seeing as I’ve been using it for ages now, but well, I’m changing the links now.

Link to the LN on Otoburi will be updated. Link to the recently released Tilea LN adaptation will be put up. Next month when EGA releases, I will put up a link for that as well.

Otoburi
Tilea