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Fifteen hours late, but hey, better than never, right?
Tired…
Kaburagi was so much worse than I expected that I was honestly at my wit’s end.
After that, even after we returned to the salon, Kaburagi kept talking to me about his ideal confessions.
He was like a bottomless well of worthless ideas.
Naturally he never brought up Wakaba-chan’s name, but anyway, all of his ideas were needlessly bombastic and unrealistic.
This wouldn’t do.
In the end I concluded that I had to put off the confession for now.
What I needed to do first was teach the idiot some common sense.
Uwah, the road ahead was tough…
“Kisshouin-san, I hear that you’ve become Masaya’s strategist?”
“Haah!?”
Since we were in public now, and I was more than a little sick of him, I had told Kaburagi to think about how to word his confession first.
Having given him his homework, I shooed him off and helped myself to some tea, but this time a smiling Enjou had come to accost me.
“What in heaven’s name are you talking about?”
“Hm? I heard it from Masaya. Apparently he employed you as his strategist.”
What the hell!? Doesn’t that make me his subordinate then!
I’ve never heard of a disciple this arrogant!
“That position seems much too important for one such as I. You are Kaburagi-sama’s closest friend. This role can only be entrusted to you.”
“Oh no, I could never…” he waved me off.
Hmph.
That’s not something I want to hear from a member of the Fulfilling Romance village like you.
You’ve got plenty of experience. Can’t you just use some of it to give him advice?
“Do you know what it is Kaburagi-sama is asking my advice on?” I asked.
“Yeah, more or less,” he said, sending a glance Kaburagi’s way.
The boy in question was sitting cross-legged by the window, quietly reading a book.
No doubt it was another stupid love poem anthology.
I could already see him sending weird quotes my way…
While I was thinking that to myself, I heard dreamy sighs from here and there.
They could only react that way because they didn’t know what a loser he was inside.
“In that case,” I started again, “would it not make even more sense for you to advise him?”
“Why do you say that?”
Because you’ve got a goddamned girlfriend!
To begin with, I wasn’t even close to Kaburagi.
Shouldn’t Enjou have been considered for the role before any thoughts came my way?
Ah, hang on.
I guess it was because of Iwamuro-kun and Class Rep…
“I think a girl’s opinion would be a lot more useful than mine,” he smiled brightly. “Kisshouin-san, I’ll leave Masaya to you.”
*
*
*
Even though I had an urna on my forehead, why was this year full of trouble?
Aaah~
What a pain.
While I pondered this on a particularly lazy Saturday, I suddenly received a message from my fellow Pivoine member, Fuyuko-sama.
‘Might we meet for a chat? It would be lovely if we had a chance to better know each other, Reika-sama.’
Being overjoyed at the chance to meet a friend outside of school, I agreed without another thought.
Fuyuko-sama had always been in my group.
Moreover, she was even a member of the Pivoine like I was.
Despite all that though, we never really had a chance to really know each other.
I guess it was because we were on different frequencies.
She really gave off the vibe of an ancient noble.
But maybe today was my chance!
She was inviting me out on a weekend after all.
What if I was about to make a new friend!?
I arrived at our meeting place full of anticipation; a lounge in some hotel.
It wasn’t long before I spotted her, as well as an older woman I didn’t know sitting next to her.
Hm?
Was this her oneesama?
I made my way towards them.
“Fuyuko-sama.”
“Reika-sama!” she exclaimed. “Thank you so much for coming! Please, take a seat!”
“Why, thank you,” I replied.
I sat down opposite the two of them and ordered a herb tea.
“…Umm, so, regarding our meeting today…”
“Ah, of course! You see, I very much wanted a chance to get to speak with you.”
…I see.
I mean, I was happy to hear that, but in that case what was the strange lady for?
I had a closer look at her.
She was wearing a suit, and seemed to be about 25, but she didn’t have make up on and looked like your everyday woman.
At least, she didn’t look like she was related to Fuyuko-sama.
Seriously, who was this?
I was slightly regretting coming here.
“I’ve noticed recently that you seemed a little threadbare. It’s been on mind for a while now,” she told me.
“Haah, I see.”
“Indeed. Reika-sama, has something been bothering you?” she asked.
“Bothering me…?” I asked. “I would not say so, no…”
“Goodness, haven’t you been having a lot of trouble with Kaburagi-sama and that commoner girl? And you’ve been speaking with him in the salon too. A lot of girls were envying you, but not me. You never looked happy to me.”
“I see…”
She was normally so quiet.
It was rare to see her so animated.
“Umm, at any rate, might I ask who this miss is…?”
“Oh, of course! This is Lady Lyuleiah! A greater healer!”
Hah?
Hiilah?
What was a hiilah?
Hira?
I looked at her suit.
As in short for “hira’sha’in(rank and file worker)”?
“Healer, as in the English word. A healer refers to a person with the ability sooth and cure. They can use their powers to heal the body and soul!”
“Pleased to meet you. I am Healer Lyuleiah.”
I gave her another once over.
This woman who didn’t seem to have a drop of foreign blood in her was apparently named Lyuleiah.
“…That is quite an unusual name.”
“It is my Healer name. It was bestowed upon me by the Virtues of the Second Sphere when they commanded me to heal and guide the people.”
“Haah…”
She handed me a violet business card.
‘Blessed by the Virtues.
Greater Healer.
Ryu-Rei-A (Dragon Spirit Love)’
Apparently her name was supposed to be Japanese.
“Lady Lyuleiah saved my heart during a rough time in my life. Since then, I have been guided by her teachings,” Fuyuko-sama told me.
“Ah, excuse me,” I called out to nearby waitress. “I would like to order your special for today, the 3-cake sampler.”
There was something really alluring about the idea of trying 3 different little cakes.
“…And lately you seemed to be having a rough time, Reika-sama, which was why I really wanted to introduce Lady Lyuleiah to you.”
Hmm~
For a while I listened to her confusing explanation, but since I never showed much interest, eventually the greater healer glared at me.
“You have been possessed by a fox spirit,” Lyuleiah concluded.
“Oh goodness! This is horrible, Reika-sama!” Fuyuko-sama exclaimed.
“I see…” I replied blandly.
So here it was.
And a fox, huh?
Honestly, at this point I didn’t care anymore.
“Unless we promptly exorcise you, your future will contain dark omens and even greater misfortune…” Lyuleiah warned me ominously.
“There is no need for that,” I said bluntly. “After all, the spirit that plagues me is not a fox, but a tanuki.”
“Huh?”
“The curse that ails me is the curse of the tanuki pup. It is a terrible curse that tanukifies your stomach if you so much as let your guard down. And the worst news is that this curse cannot be broken.”
“Reika-sama, what are you saying…?”
“However, I have grown fond of this tanuki, and am prepared to have him with me for life. Annoying perhaps, but quite cute once you get used to him. For this reason, I must decline your exorcism. Dark omens will be crushed, misfortunes conquered, should they ever impede my path.”
Having finished up the cakes and herb tea, I gave a confident,
“Well then, gokigen’yoh.”
And promptly took my leave.
I had thought Fuyuko-sama was somebody who lived in another world, untouched by our common troubles, but it turned out that she was actually one of those types…
Geez…
When I returned home, the evil tanuki spirit was lying in wait with tarts of this season’s fruit in order to curse me.
Eei!
Your dark magic tempts me not!
お兄ちゃん、やめてぇ！ 
First. Incidentally, the last line means something along the lines of,
“Watch, as I temper myself and show that I can conquer the evil within and without.”
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that started to sound like a Xianxia novel for a sec.
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Pfft. Reika, is your Tanuki curse perhaps your dad who keeps buying you tasty food and making you fat? Kekekekeke
Im glad Reika isn’t dumb enough to fall for some cult scams. Don’t get tricked to join a cult! Hahahaha.
Cults are scary (Recently someone has been dropping by my house every week to preach to me about how humans can live a much longer life etc etc, and I have no idea how to get rid of them without being rude, seriously, they started preaching about the power of humans etc etc, but dude. I ain’t interested (are you perhaps trying to induct me into your cult? If so, please get straight to the point, and stop dropping by my house) (i don’t have a peephole, and that makes it scary))
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Why you don’t go out on the weekend? Having fun or such, avoid the troublesome dude 😅
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I pretended not to be home once(they knocked for ages, and may or may not have yanked open the window next to the door a bit wider – thank goodness that was a high window, I was feeling disturbed).
And they came back the next day, when my friends came over, so I couldn’t pretend not to be home. They’ve been dropping by for the past 3 weeks, preaching to me… I would rather they get straight to the point and attempt to recruit me, but all they do is preach and ask me to consider their words and they’ll drop by again… 😫😫😫
They’ll probably drop by again in a few days time…
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That was last week by the way.😓
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I would try directly telling this person (from the door) that you are not interested and that they should leave before it becomes unpleasant. If they can’t accept an honest request/rejection you may need to contact authorities, this is harassment but who knows if it would escalate.
I hope you find a good way to resolve it.
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maybe you should start first with politely getting their personal information from them, then after you get it – inform them that you shall report to the police their harassment or something if they do not stop?
…or just keep ordering pizza to their adress and name :x
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Yes, get their information so if this continues you can report them.
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call cop is the best way, if your country cops are as worse as mine , give them money.
never try to offending them as they mind summon an army of mad believers to harass you.
or join another huge cult like Church, Buddhism etc and summon another army of preachers to deal with them
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Lol. Fight fire with fire!
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Ask them why would they want to live longer? And if you did live longer and already did everything that has to be done on Earth, as in everything, what would they do next? What if you get tired of everything to the point you don’t want to do anything anymore, why would you want to live longer?
Just imagine you’re an immortal vampire and ask such questions. That’ll might stop them.
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My brother told them I wasn’t interested last year (they stopped for a while, thank goodness), but they came back this year.
Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
I don’t even care about the potential of immortality of humans and I don’t wanna spend 30 min of my life standing there and totally zoning out while they go on and on. So. I pretended I wasn’t home. The silence should be a hint for them yo leave rightttt? But noooo they continued waiting outside my door and continued to knock. This is turning into some kind of horror show. But they only came once this year, and a few weeks ago, so I’m probably fineee…..?
I’m working most of the time these days, and I spend my weekends knocked out on the floor or somewhere in my room so I don’t hear the knocks. Hehe.
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And this year? The recruitment still going?
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That sounds like a cultivator trying to recruit you as his disciple
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Nope, a cultivator would be monologuing about face during at least half of the sermon duration if not more…
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She has a whole bunch of her own so why should she give a damn about other’s scams? Hers are the real deal! The girl is quite observant though~
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Just don’t answer the door.
Peepholes in doors exist for a reason.
Don’t open the door go to your room and get distracted with music or something.
The idiot will be gone.
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Unfortunately, my door doesn’t have a peephole 😅
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As commented, being outside is a strategy. It’s best not to engage – who knows what kind of cult it is… Depending on how insistent they are, you may also want to report them to the police.
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Oh I get those people sometimes. I just stare at them dead in the eye while they talk with no expression on my face. When they finish their speal, I nod and say thanks but I like the way I’m living now. In the dumps and in depression. Then I smile and say bye, closing the door in their face. Not sure if that’s rude or not but. It works for me.
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spiel* not speal sorry
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I happen to be one of those people who go door to door and its not a cult lol just showing people what the bible says because what it says can be comforting and so we tell people because we want to brighten their day and show love for our neighbors and all you have to do is just say you are not interested, it would not be rude but rather would stop them from wasting their time. They would actually really appreciate knowing you are not interested instead of being angry at you :) and believe me its not like they want you to find them scary and keep coming back to torture you but the opposite. If they knew you found them scary they’d just feel bad >.< lol I'm speaking for myself here too :P
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That’s all well and good, but from the way he’s talking they’re more persistent than well meaning. If you knock and no one answers, you move on, right? Do you keep knocking and knocking?
It’s also entirely possible that this IS a cult. There’s all kinds out there.
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Apparently you can turn chuunibyou into a career if you try hard enough. Good on her.
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More like chuunibyou are easy prey for cult fraud
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No you can’t fool Reika-sama Queen of Delusions!
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Some kind of food are reputed to tame or repel evil spirits…
Maybe Reika should make some of those (with cornet homecooking style) and offer them to this evil tanuki spirit, if if doesn’t banish it on the spot it should probably pacify it for a time (at least until he come back from his stay in the hospital)….
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probably the most entertaining moment in the series.
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Poor papa, now he is an evil curse.
Thank you 5th Holy Sheeprabbit, Kilimanjaro Estelion Sharlulu Asheel Vinchance Celenalia di ef Falufiluu’Luufilaafee (The 35th) da ne! for your hard work!
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Reika san.. Great speaking as always…
Btw thank you For translating this for us
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Thanks 4 the chapter!!!
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Sorry but our village head delusions are more of the romance type instead of chuuni-ness. True romance exist only in fantasy, real romance is but transient. True story.
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Yeah, Reika would never believe some Chuuni story like having been reincarnated in some fictional wor-
….
You know, maybe Reika shouldn’t be so dismissive about this stuff.
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She hasn’t mentioned her former life lately. Will she believe it to be a childish dream one day?
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Reika-sama’s adventures with a cultist! She’s pretty good at adlibing in situations like these.
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She and her mother from a lifetime ago probably had to shoot away shady religious witnesses and newspaper sales people for years.
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>> He was like an bottomless well of worthless ideas.
Pfff
(Should be *a* bottomless well not *an* by the way)
>> “That position seems much too important for one such as I. You are Kaburagi-sama’s closest friend. This role can only be entrusted to you.”
>> “Oh no, I could never…” he waved me off.
>> Hmph.
+1 Enjou
>> “In that case,” I started again, “would it not make even more sense for you to advise him?”
>> “Why do you say that?”
>> Because you’ve got a goddamned girlfriend!
Still mad about this huh.
>> “Ah, excuse me,” I called out to nearby waitress. “I would like to order your special for today, the 3-cake sampler.”
>> There was something really alluring about the idea of trying 3 different little cakes.
>> “…And lately you seemed to be having a rough time, Reika-sama, which was why I really wanted to introduce Lady Lyuleiah to you.”
Reika: “Please hold with the crazy a second, I see cakes”
>> Having finished up the cakes and herb tea, I gave a confident,
I was thinking at the end “wait, did she leave before the cakes arrived” but nooo that’s not Reika at all.
Although logically she couldn’t have eat all cakes with just the dialogue shown…
>> I had thought Fuyuko-sama was somebody who lived in another world, untouched by our common troubles, but it turned out that she was actually one of those types…
I’m disappointed as well…
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I’m pretty sure Reika just ate those cakes SUPER fast to get away from the crazies.
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Enjou is somehow girlfriend-zoned.
Damn ikemen.
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This novel is just full of disappointing ojou-samas, kekeke
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3-cake samplers’ slices are usually smaller than normal slices.
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Thank you for the chapter!
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Has Fuyuko ever showed up in any of the previous chapters? I don’t remember her.
Also, Enjou CLEARLY knows what’s up with Masaya and Reika, and washes his hands of any responsibility! lol Poor Reika…assaulted first by Kaburagi, then by crazy cult people right after. Our Reika needs a nice relaxing vacation to de-stress.
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http://kenkyokenjitsu.wikia.com/wiki/Haginokouji_Fuyuko
She is a Pivoine member in Reika-sama’s grade. She was the girl who doesn’t finish the hikes during school excursion.
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An intrusive subplot appears!
Subplot uses False Sympathy! It’s not very effective…
Reika uses Snub! It’s super effective!
Reika escapes! 😋
(Thanks for all your hard work! 😉)
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thank for the update
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Thanks 4 the chapter!
Well, you could say that the girl does live in another world.
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Our queen don’t need a healer….what she needs badly is love Cupid with arrow shoot straight to her and lovely boy for her first love. Thanks
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Reika….. you are wrong.There is a fox curse on you. He is lurking in the shadows and scares all of love “candidats” away. Because you already HIS. Enjou will not let go of you.
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“Even though I have an urna on my forehead . . . ”
I couldn’t remember if this has been mentioned before, so I Wikipedia’d it.
Urna ” . . . is a spiral or circular dot placed on the forehead of Buddhist images as an auspicious mark . . . It is generally thought to be a whorl of hair and be a mark or sign of the Buddha as a mahāpuruṣa or great being.”
Something about “third-eyes” and “divine-vision.” So, before Reika reincarnated from . . . Who was she before? Well, before that, she was obviously Buddha.
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It’s in reference to a lock of hair curling in the opposite direction, IIRC.
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Also, Lyuleiah is going to be Reika’s next disciple. I’m calling it.
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Not only bothering the goddess with his utter uselessness, but even declaring that she is working FOR him??…that baka needs to learn his place!
(shipping glasses-OFF) Oi, Enjou! What’s going on with you and that “relative” of yours? Stop confusing readers and go stop your loser best friend from disturbing goddess Kali!
Also, it seems that Reika is attracting another unique character again.
Once again, poor tanuki XDD
Thanks so much for the update! Mmm, fruit tarts sound wonderful~
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[What the hell!? Doesn’t that make me his subordinate then!
I’ve never heard of a disciple this arrogant!]
LOL, Reika is so savage in this chapter..
Don’t worry Reika, let’s us defeat this tanuki’s curse together.. I heard that eating apple everyday will do wonder!!
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I really liked Reika’s way of handling that xD
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Enjou Pov
Masaya was incessantly talking about his plans with Kisshouin, he droned on about every single detail about their conversation…
“Really is she capable of telling me how to go about this?”
Masaya seemed conflicted, I had to suppress a grin when I got a recap of what she said to him. I could imagine her expression and reactions, my eyes glaze over when I think of skywriting “I love you” or that room full of Roses… I had to turn away from this lovesick fool while I massaged my poker face, was it painful for you Kisshouin? did this idiot wear you down? do you see how foolish and simplistic he is?
I was certain that she would never hold any romantic notions about him after this, not that I had any doubt since she has always held us both at arm’s length, the smug expression I had disappeared with that thought, I’m not a fool like him Kisshouin! don’t lump me together with him! cast disdain towards him, not me! as I looked at Masaya again, I suppressed an urge to smack his forehead.
“So she is to become your Sensei then?”
Masaya looked at me then snorted.
“I question her romantic expertise, she was not impressed with anything I planned on doing for Takamichi, hell I even detected disgust coming from her!”
Oh ho ho… my dense friend managed to pick up on that? Kisshouin your carefully crafted polite facade towards Masaya is cracking, can you empathize with me? I have endured this for many years! but then again I would not find any sympathy from you regarding this at all…
“She’s more like my Consultant, she will help me plan my next move on Takamichi” Is she getting paid for this then? I would ask for a considerable sum, I hope negotiations went well. I entered the salon scanning the room for my target, the Empress looked so peeved, I couldn’t help but use this opportunity to chat with her.
“Kisshouin-san, I hear that you’ve become Masaya’s strategist?” I could see shadows under her eyes. Ganbatte! endure! I can be a shoulder to lean on, as if she would do that…
“Haah!?” You’ve been recruited Kisshouin, there is no escape for you… join me, share my pain!
“What in heaven’s name are you talking about?” We both serve the Love monster by the window, resistance is futile, I refuse to suffer alone!
“Hm? I heard it from Masaya. Apparently, he employed you as his strategist.” Oh, Kisshouin you are displaying your true feelings without hiding a single one, ho ho ho… Masaya do you realize how much resentment Kisshouin has for you? My condolences, it will only get worse from here on… make sure you get full benefits under Masayas employment plan!
“That position seems much too important for one such as I. You are Kaburagi-sama’s closest friend. This role can only be entrusted to you.”
“Oh no, I could never…” Don’t try and palm it off on me!
“Do you know what it is Kaburagi-sama is asking my advice on?” She looks so annoyed, I feel for you Kisshouin I truly do, but not enough to save you from your fate… I mentally pat your soft curly head of hair, aah, I really want to touch them…
“Yeah, more or less,” I looked at Masaya knowing how engrossed he was in that book, I could literally see disgusting romantic ideas sprouting… please no more love poems, enough with that shit! I’m truly sorry, but I finally have another to share this burden with, I won’t let you go!
I watched Kisshouins expression when she heard those girlish sighs, that look of repressed disgust, as though she wanted to shout “He only looks good! but the inside is rotten!!”
“In that case, would it not make even more sense for you to advise him?” she almost looked pleading, my heart jolted, did she give me puppy dog eyes? am I imagining that? was she trying to use her considerable feminine charm to influence me? no, I was imagining it, as if she would… ah.. damn daydreams.
“Why do you say that?” Now it was my turn to earn her disgust, she looked at me with those expressive eyes screaming at me “What the hell are you saying isn’t it obvious!”
“I think a girl’s opinion would be a lot more useful than mine,” I smiled brightly. “Kisshouin-san, I’ll leave Masaya to you.” My.. the resentment is strong with Kisshouin, I may need some kind of charm, in case Kijo appears…
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Thanks for the chapter!
The curse of the evil Tanuki is tempting indeed.
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W.
T.
F.
!!!
A chuuni cult?! So scary!
Poor tanuki-papa, Reika-san, please don’t be too hard with your curse, I mean papa.
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Cults are scary…
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Reika almost exorcised the tanuki for good once
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By exercising the Tanuki~
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I was hoping the Fuyuko would open up an interesting new plotline since the girls around Reika generally aren’t very well characterized, and the ones that are, Reika doesn’t spend enough time with.
Instead I got a full blast of crazy.
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She’s a nice girl, she just gets into all sorts of supernatural fads, like energy stones and the like.
You know the type. Like the funnier cousins to the fad-diet detox girls.
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She’s being taken advantage of, is what.
I’m allergic to superstition at the best of times.
I see “gluten-free,” ph basic water with electrolytes being sold in stores and am smh.
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That she is.
Now, I would never take advantage of you.
On that note, how would you like to buy some spirit rocks?
On first glance they might seem like your average Australian rocks, but in fact these are relics from the mythic Dreamtime era, and can guide you in the afterlife.
Safeguard your soul now, for just 99.99!
(Shipping not included)
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Gingers have no souls.
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That’s a happy coincidence, because I sell those too.
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I will purchase 45.
Do you do bulk discounts?
Also, I don’t want any Australian souls. Convicts are no good.
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Reika tried to throw the aggro at Enjou, but he’s too sly… Also:
Fuyuko: “Since the *healer* didn’t help, today I’d like to take you to my crystal therapist! We can swing by the homeopathy center and the fortune teller!”
Reika-sama should probably get a talisman to ward off phony exorcists…
BTW, anyone else catch on Fuyuko noticing Reika wasn’t happy talking to Kaburagi? If she noticed, maybe others have too… Perhaps he’s the baka elephant in the Pivoine room?
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Thanks. She should at least get Enjou to help drill some common sense into Bakaburagi, doesn’t have to be romantic advice.
“When I returned home, the evil tanuki spirit was lying in wait with tarts of this season’s fruit in order to curse me.
Eei!
Your dark magic tempts me not!”
Man that made me lol after the “terrible curse that tanukifies your stomach if you so much as let your guard down“ bit
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I laughed so much. Epic. Very, VERY impressed. XD XD XD
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR BEING AWESOME!
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deal with the scammer like a Queen, Reika the Drill Queen
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— Thanks for the chapter~ ^^.
Well, well, well, wonder what will happen next. sigh..!!
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Thank you for chapter 😜😜😜😜
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That’s one way to deal with scammers.
Thanks for the chapter.
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Reika-sama surely attracts Odd people that is out of this world… Does she have oddball magnet or something?
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My reaction to the healer’s name was, “Rlyeh? You must be possessed by Chtulhu!”
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thnx for the chapter
and oh at least she likes her dad now
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Thanks for the chapter!
Lol, Reika’s response to the healer lady. XD
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Meatbun Delivery~
Thank you for the chapter ( ●w●)
It turns out to be a cult recruitment scam..
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Bakaburagi’s strategist. Does a strategist really tell you how moronic your common sense is? I’d say it’s much more life an etiquette coach, or maybe a life coach.
I wondered what Fuyuki wanted with Reika, but this I had not imagined. I feel a little bad for her, though. I think she honestly just wanted to help. The curse of the Tanuki! Dark omens avail :O Reika is so silly.
Thanks for the chapter.
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Sounds a bit like Julia
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I started rereading Kenkyo Kenjitsu again! Gotta love Reika and her reactions!
She just ate cake and deflected the cultist with honest sass (is that a thing, I see Reika sassing her but totally telling the truth about the Tanuki curse (Kisshouin papa)) and then going home.
Reika-sama teach me your ways! I’ll bribe you with candy.
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Is the fox spirit Enjou?
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And this year? The recruitment still going?
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