[Rewrite] I’m the Final Boss!? – Chapter 5 (Joke Chapter)

The War Begins


It had been a long six months trapped on that hellhole of a boat. The water tasted like filth, and the food wasn’t much better.

‘It’ll all be over soon though,’ I think to myself as I stretch my sore muscles. Another night of restlessness, and I knew it was because I was nearing my enemy. I sigh and say, “I’ll be glad to finally be off this boat.”

Making my way above deck, I notice that my companions on this boat had all already gotten up and were preparing for the upcoming landing. They had proven to be good people on this journey, and I hoped wherever they were headed to after this, it would be a peaceful place.

Nearing the bridge, I couldn’t help but notice the bullet holes that scarred this once beautiful (lol) ship, and thought back to the fight that put them there.

It had been another boring day at sea, but something felt slightly different. It was as if there was a tension in the air which wasn’t there previously. I was on my guard, but I still didn’t notice the attack helicopter until it was too late. Without warning, we were bombarded, and I lost one of my eyes in the resulting explosions. It was painful to be sure, but it still wasn’t enough to put me down. We managed to regroup and mount a counterattack. It was a difficult battle, but eventually to get a lucky hit in and managed to bring them down, sending them plummeting into the icy water around us. There were no survivors… I made sure of that.

It was later that I found out the helicopter belonged to Cipher… a division of g*d hand. My enemy knew I was coming, and sent the blasted thing to kill me. It was going to feel good when I choked the life out of him.

Shaking my head to clear my darkening thoughts, I sought out the weight resting on my back. It had been a comfort to me over the months, and I was glad I had it with me. The rest had argued that this sword was far too large for such a young child, but I was adamant about wielding it. It was the sword I chose, and it provided comfort when I needed it most.

Satisfied with the weight on my back, I entered the bridge and raised a hand in greeting to the one I had gotten closest to during my time on this boat.

“Finally up, huh?” Lynx asked me as he lazily returned my greeting. He was a fairly tall man with black hair and a full beard. His nickname was “Machine Pistol” Lynx because he always carried around his machine pistols, but I still didn’t quite understand it.

I laughed and replied, “You know me. I’ve been up since last night.” My voice had grown rougher over these past six months, and it was always amusing to see the reactions of other people when I first talk to them. Lynx had gotten used to it by now though, so there was no reaction.

“Still thinking your enemy is up ahead?” Lynx sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. The other members of this crew had all heard about my circumstances, and knew that I was chasing after someone, but none of them approved of it. They thought I was still too young.

“I know he is. I can feel it. My blood is boiling and I can’t sleep.” I say with a ferocious smile, “He’s there… and I’m going to finally kill him.”

“No stopping you then, huh?” Lynx says as he finally turns to face me with resignation on his face. “Well, good luck then kid. I hope after this we’ll be able to meet again someday.”

“It was better than I thought it would be… travelling with you guys that is.” I say with a hint of a smile. “Made the rest of the experience actually tolerable.” I pause for a second to ponder over his words again. In surprise, I ask, “Wait a minute. Have we made it to shore already?”

Laughing Lynx replied, “I can’t believe you didn’t see it. We’ve already landed. I’m just here writing in the ship’s logs.”

Running from the bridge and to the bow, I finally see that Lynx wasn’t joking with me. We had made it to shore. I guess when I first got above deck, we had already landed, and everyone was preparing to go ashore.

Stepping back to get a running start, I catapult myself off the bow and hit the beach, rolling to break the fall. ‘I’m finally here,’ I think to myself.

I take a moment to smell the air and get used to land once more before I take off running. My enemy was before me, and my body was itching to take off after him. However, before I could, the crew stood in front of me, blocking my path. Not long after, Lynx jumped down from the ship as well, and joined them.

“What’s going on?” I asked as I raised my guard. To think they would backstab me here of all places. They had built up my trust, and were going to kill me on the shores of the land my enemy walked.

Seeing my anger, Lynx held up his hands and said, “Now hold on. Before you go thinking we’ve all betrayed you, did you really think we’d let you go without saying goodbye? You were about to take off there.” Under his breath he adds, “Really, sometimes I think all you’ve got in that head of yours is mullet. No brain at all.”

“Wha-what?” I managed to get out. I hadn’t expected we had grown so close over the journey. The only one I ever really talked to was Lynx after all.

Ignoring me, Lynx turns to the rest of the crew and asks, “Where would we all be if not for this girl here?”

“Dead!” They shout in unison.

“That’s right!” Lynx nods his head. “Without her here, we would have been on the bottom of the ocean by now!”

“Guys… what?” I ask dumbfoundedly.

Turning back to me, Lynx shouts, “Salute the Boss!” as he and the others begin saluting the still confused me.

Mechanically, I salute back using the hand I had lost earlier in the journey, and the one that was currently replaced by a red metal one. I couldn’t say anything in response. They had completely taken me off-guard.

Lynx smiles and drops his salute as everyone else does. “Go get him, kid.”

As my legs start working again and begin to take me away from this crew, I manage to get out one question as I pass by Lynx. “Where did Boss come from?” However, I was too far gone by the time he could answer.

Stopping at the edge of the forest connected to the beach, I think about the crew and the times we had shared. I hadn’t thought we were close, but it seems they felt they owed me after the helicopter battle.

I shake my head and refocus my thoughts. They were a good crew, and I will surely miss them, but my focus now has to be on the fight ahead. I’ll be dealing with the one known as “Skull Face”, the younger, and uglier brother of “Skull Knight”. It won’t be an easy battle, and I’m sure he has some tricks up his sleeve, but with the sword on my back, the mullet on my head, and this rocket propelled mechanical hand of mine, I’ll take him down.

As I look forward to the battles ahead, and think back to my earlier thoughts of having already reached my enemy, I realize… My journey has only just begun.


Author’s Note:


And that’s it folks!
Glad I was able to get the final chapter in for you guys.
I realize I couldn’t keep it up anymore, and decided to end it in a way I thought fitting.

I hope you enjoyed.


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Well… it’s a joke though.
This video inspired the post: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VnLY_iQxGU
Real chapter can be found here: Chapter 5 – “Another Perspective.”

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